Hi,I cheated on my girlfriend about 8 month after I move and we started dating, Then again about 7 months later. After that, I time started going back to school to get a degree and didn’t cheat on her again until about 3 months ago. She got a job near me, I was transferred for my job, and we moved in with each other. One day I was really board and placed an ad on adultfriendsfinders.com and she accidentally open my email and say an email from the sight. She try and talk to me but I gave a stupid answer and hope the problem would go away. Will it did and so did she. She moved back home when I went hunting. We talk and I told her I was going to start counseling and try and find out why I do these kind of things. I am one my third week and things are going good with the counselor. We had our first real long and open talk last Saturday and we both thought it went well. Then we talk Monday night and I do not know what to think now after that talk. She not sure if I’m going to get another chance, but she give little signs that it might happen. What I’m asking is what should I do. I know that actions speak louder than words, but how do I show her actions when I don’t see her? Also I don’t want to give up hope that we can make this work. I would like some advice.

Thanks
I'm new to the board and here is my story.

When you play with fire, you get burned!!

We teach those around us how to treat us!!

It looks as though your gf may have taught you the same thing you taught her, how to go about ones self way!? solo style babe!

*The choices one makes dictates the life they choose*

I suppose maybe the need to remember what dating is all about, the answers and questions found, during dating!!

Unfortunately it sounds like you are a serial cheater. Get this issue fixed before anything else or it will haunt you for the rest of your life. Can you imagine being married with this problem? I am glad for your GF you are not married.

Keep up with the counseling. And yes, actions do speak louder than words so keep proving so by your actions. Do everything you can to better yourself and fix the areas you messed up in.

She is smart for moving out. If she stayed with you, you probably would not bothered to try changing.

Don't worry about your GF, if she loves you she will still be there. She will be able to tell your sincerety without having to see you all of the time. Worry about yourself first and make sure you try to fix things for yourself first and not her.

Best of luck!

Acord, you might not be able to get your GF back, but at least you will have learned a very hard lesson. It might be best for her not to come back, but at least if you straighten up your life for a while, you might be able to have a healthy, open honest relationship in the future. It doesn't sound to me like you are marriage material at all and she probably realizes this.

Acord,

Welcome to MB. U probably feel like a heel. You are not alone. There are many here who start out as the WS and have a hard road to recovery.

What is in your advantage is that you are young, you acknowledged your problem and are seeking help.

Like ML said, I can't say that your current R w/b saved. That is up to her to forgive you. You can only do what is right and hope she gives you a chance. No way can you demand anything.
Your lost that right when you violated her trust. Probably others are saying to dump you.

So you have your reputation to fix. It w/b hard but if you keep doing the right thing, you will get there. You need to excercise patience. Pray for a clear mind and a calm heart.

It hurts me to know you went to AFF. That is where my H met the OW. She is a psyco that has inflicted great pain on my family and is currently on a warpath to destroy me. Imagine that, I am not the one who had the A but this OW thinks she has this right to control or ruin me. Well look out OW, this BS is smarter than she realizes and knows her rights.

So please Acord, stay away from those AFF sites. They are full of very very immoral and dangerous characters, even if they look like the 'old lady down the street' (OW looks like that - <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> ).

L.