This is probably going to end up rambling....I know not where....
I'm in the 3rd week of my first anniversary of the descent into hell....it's trigger season!!
And I'm acting like a crazy, overwhelmed, trigger-fighting lunatic BS-woman....
Short timeline....
Sept 20, last year...FWH insisted that new lease be issued in his name alone, no longer joint, and arranged with LL that FWH would have the power to evict me if he chose....
Oct 1, last year...FWH admitted being interested and "in love" with someone else...The dreaded "soul-mate syndrome"
Oct 4, her b-day, bought her a bunch of jewelry, proclaiming undying love, it was meant to be....blah, blah, yuck...
About Oct. 10, last year, OW calls me, saying, "Just thought I'd ask you a few questions, cuz what he's telling me doesn't add up"....Hoo Boy....
Oct 20, last year, his b-day, he'd made plans to take OW to his family b-day celebration, not me...I called a pow-wow, He, OW and me.....if the M was over, fine, but no more lies, manipulation, and cake-eating...he went to his family's b-day party all by himself, OW and I chatted for several hours....
Oct 27, he told OW he was staying w/ me....
Fog, fantasies and fling w/OW#2 lasted for 9 more months...I'd have 2 more d-days coming....
He's actually been reality-based for only about 12 weeks or so now....
BUT...during my craziness the last 3 weeks...he hasn't run, he hasn't tried to hide or escape my pain & intermittent wrath...
He hasn't been the re-assuring, remorseful, understanding mate that I'd ideally like, either...I haven't been able to lean on him as much as I'd like.....
BUT-he's here, he's engaging, he's trying....not my way, but his way....
I think when he gets home from work tonight, I'll give him a great big kiss, hug, maybe more....LOL! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
I'm thinking I'll reward his progress, and quit obsessing over his non-perfection right now....
A good plan? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
We've discussed enduring short-term discomforts for long-term benefits....
I think I'll tell him that enduring the short-term discomfort of trigger season will reap him some really good long-term benefits....like TRUST, APPRECIATION, ADMIRATION, SF.....et cetera.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
