A revision with more "feelings"

Dear WW,

I want you to know, and I believe you do, that I love you with all my heart and have from almost the first time I set eyes on you at the Sheraton.

When you held that fortune cookie in you hand my heart beat so hard I just knew you could hear it. And yes, it was my lucky day.

When each girl was born, I looked at you and yes -
I knew it was my lucky day.

When my parents died and you held me while I cried, yes - I knew it was my lucky day.

I realize now the mistakes I have made that created an unhappy life for you. I was not there for you when you needed me most, and we are both now suffering for my mistake. I never intentionally wanted to hurt you or make you unhappy and am truly sorry that I did.

I am taking steps to correct those things in my life that allowed this to happen.

The affair you are having with OM has torn out my heart and is too painful for me to bear anymore. It is destroying the love and the respect that I have for you and this is something I desperately do not want to happen.

As long as you are having the affair with OM, or you have any contact with him, I cannot see or speak with you. When the affair ends, I would love to discuss reconciliation and the rebuilding of our relationship and our marriage with you.

But until that time, I ask that you respect my decision to separate from you this way and not contact me for anything. All issues that cannot go through the children can go through (FRIEND) who will act as an intermediary.


Love DDAD

I ask her to marry me in fortune cookie at our favorite restaurant and mine said today is your lucky day.

Orchid: I am ready to answer her questions without anger.

Queen: About all the feelings I can muster. She's in OM's arms now, I've nothing to lose.

3rd Wheel: What pushed me into Plan B is the fact I am afraid I am going to lose all love for her if I don't act now.

Hurting PK: You were out voted on the feelings stuff.

TMCM: Thanks. I've read that letter over and over plagerized some.

Everyone: How necessary is the copy to the OM?

DD

Very nice, especially since you added those emotional reminders of happier times in your letter that the ladies suggested to you in your other thread. You got my vote to send it as is.

Looks good to me. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

All the best.
L.

I think this version is much better. Good luck and keep us posted how things are going for you.

The only thing that I would take out is the word "desperately." Desperation isn't attractive. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Go for it and may God's presence be with you!

Thank you all. I did go for it. Put letter in her car last night. This morning I get nasty E-mail. I am holding on for the ride. Going to go to Plan B thread for support.


[/B]Once again thank you all for your help![/B]

DD

<small>[ November 13, 2003, 12:33 PM: Message edited by: devastated_dad ]</small>

Yay! Nasty e-mail means there's still emotion there. Stay out of the way and let things happen. You have no idea what's going to happen from here on out, and whatever it is, your job is to stay completely out of the way of it.

I agree with Just J in that her nasty e-mail shows that there are still feelings for you. She may have felt mad when she read it because she may have felt that now that she is involved with the OM you now want her when in the past you didn't so much blink at her. But whatever the reason, she knows that the ball is now in her court and that it is up to her if the marriage ends or survives to be rebuilt.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by devastated_dad:
<strong> Thank you all. I did go for it. Put letter in her car last night. This morning I get nasty E-mail. I am holding on for the ride. Going to go to Plan B thread for support.


[/B]Once again thank you all for your help![/B]

DD </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well in fog talk, that's progress - <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Hang the big dip is around the corner. Strap in tight, it will be a wild ride. But you will survive. Keep posting here.

Hugz,
L.

Today got 20 calls from her. I wouldn't talk - hung up cell phone when showed her numbers and erased messages as soon as heard her charming voice on the home answer machine.

Told intermediary when she called that WW should refer to PBL and I would only talk when those conditions were met.

Holdin' on for the ride & staying dark.

DD

DD

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Hold on.... rough waters ahead. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Proud of you, bro'.

L.

You're doing very well, devastated! Keep going, keep going, keep going!

DD,

Sorry I havent posted up until now...been very busy at work, as well as on my own ride right now.

Oh, how I LOVE a good Plan B!!! And you have started off great. Actually, I kind of miss the Plan B times right now. they were so much easier than recovery.

Hang in there. You know the rules. I agree with everyone above, her reaction shows she is in the fog, but there are still great feelings for you there.

You have just taken away what she needs. the pain level has increased. Everytime she tries to call you and doesnt get thru, her pain level increases. This is all VERY GOOD!

I am glad to hear that you are protecting yourself by not listening to the voicemails, etc. Although, I would LOVE to hear her fog babble! I actually found my wife's fog babble while I was in Plan B very entertaining. Of course, I shouldnt have listened to the voicemails. But they didnt affect me like most. I actually enjoyed them, because I KNEW that she was in the fog and that this Plan B was pushing her off the fence. it was kind of interesting to watch. The Harleys' are geniuses.

Anyway, as the great Just Learning says...Steady as She goes, DD!

In His arms.