Just recently I disclosed to my wife of 12 years that I had an affair ( lasted only 30 days or so). Needless to say the effect it has had on her and our children is beyond belief. This was not the first time this has happened; approximately 4 years into our marriage I did stray.

Unfortunately I now have two strikes against me and have finally sought professional help. Our main focus is the children and we have not even discussed what is going to happen between us. It has been about 1 month since we have separated and I have no idea what she wants to do. I would like to reconcile and improve our marriage but I have my doubts if she will ever give me that chance. Is all hope lost?

Hi Lonelyfather,

If you truly desire to reconcile your Marriage all hope is never lost. Even if your Wife may not seem to want to, you have to take the proper steps to prove to her it is what you want. You have to figure out for yourself why it is you've done what you've done and how to prevent it from happening in the future.

Read up on this site about the concepts for improving a marriage, I would even buy the book "Surviving an Affair" for you and your wife to read, "His Needs, Her Needs" etc. Show her you truly desire to reconcile and make your marriage stronger then it was before.

If you believe in God pray pray pray pray and then pray some more! And if you don't, I highly suggest seeking God during these tough times to help you get through this and to tell him sincerely how much you are truly sorry and how much you really want your marriage back.

Matthew 19:26
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Best of luck and God bless.