Steve, and I hope they do come home, too. I really do. Hopefully, she will come to her senses.

its been 2 1/2 weeks with no reply form my wife at all. Should I get on of my friends to test the waters and see how she feels, to see if she would even consider talking to me?

Oh no, Steve, please don't contact her at all. Let her contact you if any contacting is to be done. Dont' get impatient! How are the girls? Have you given any more thought to trying to get custody? If she is on painkillers that is even more reason to try and get them. What do you think?

My wife has been talking to one of my friends,
he was one of the people always over and whom we used to go out with, He has been talking to her
trying to get her feelings in a very indirect way, talking about old times etc. Today I gave my sis in law a check for the wife, she called my wife and wife did not answer but did call her back, this has changed since a coulpe of weeks ago my wife would not even look or talk to her while grocey shopping. I have also found out that my wife called several of the phone numbers from my cell phone records asking them if they have ever been out with me etc. people that she
called has told me she said stuff like, I met you the other night when you were out with Steve
etc. not true. I am not going to contact the wife, like I said my friend that my wife hated a few months ago but now calls is going to meet her
for lunch, she called in out of the blue asking him what I done New years Eve, and was telling him she knew what I done etc, trying to get him to admit something, all he told her was I have no idea what he done.
any advice, does it look like she is softening up maybe just a little?

It looks like she is trying to dig up dirt on you so she can defend herself in court. I am sorry to have to point that out, but that is what I sense here.

Oh I know exactly what she is trying to do, what I am asking is that since she is now talking to friends and sis in law whom she hated just weeks ago, does it look like she is maybe having second thoughts. Just weeks ago she was saying she hated my friend because bla bla bla, same thing sith sis in law. Now she is wanting to meet my friend for lunch. Now she at least called
sis in law back when 2 weeks ago she did not even speak to her when they were 10' apart.
and tonight when I called for the girls she talked normal telling me my oldest daughter was at a kids camp at church with the neighbor.
not real sarcastic like last week.

hmm, just be real careful. Maybe it is a good sign! On the other hand, could she be trying to get info from them to use against you? Why do you think she's being nice? Thats a new development.

I have no idea right now why she is being nice,
thats why the friend is going to meet her for lunch. there is nothing either of them can tell my wife that would hurt me. the divorce date is set for April 14th, I spoke to my attorney and my wife has not reurned the answers to the inorogitories, they are going to file a motion to compel. all of my answers have been delivered to her attorney. she has my cell records and is going down them calling numbers she dosent
reconize.

My friend talked to my wife today, she got the answers from the questions her attorney asked me, she is very mad, thinks I am trying to make her look bad, thinks I am going to take the kids from her, she was mad I had listed all of our friends to be supoenaed. Told the friend I was all about myself. I did not do anything unless I stood to gain something from it. she told the friend she has not liked me for the past few years, hard to tell since we had sex 3 or 4 times per week with her starting it all the time. Told my friend she was loosing weight and her hair was falling out, she was mad that all our friends was talking about poor old Steve.
My friend mentioned counseling and wife said she was going to need it, friend mentioned us together getting it and she said no. She then told the friend I was being fake to the kids
and it made her sick to hear my voice. said I was a big put on.

Sounds like she is still trying hard to yank your chain and just can't do it. Any thoughts on getting custody?

I really dont know whaT my attorney has asked for, My wife was telling my friend, see Steve wants you to testify that I am a bad mother unfit etc. My friend knows better, Wife is late on returning the answers to the questins my attorney asked. my friend was here and i listened on the other line, he said he know 80% was bs. wife still talked about when I cried the
day and weeks after she left. said the neighbor
her friend, called and told her this. wife was telling friend how divorce did not happen on her
side of the family, talked about how I handled her mom not liking me. I done what my wife asked me to do. now she wants to blame me. friend is
going to ask her to go to counseling with me.

Steve, do you feel like she has become unstable? Was she always so unstable and vindictive when you were together?

no all my friend ssay they want the old S***** to come back, they say they dont know her, when she talks to my friend she tells them I hrove her crazy. She tells them she was/has been so unhappy for so many years that she is now letting it all out. how can she be unhappy for so long and not tell anyone and also have 2 beautiful kids with me and then say she never loved me. sounds like bs

Well, it sounds like affair talk but with her it sounds like MORE. Do you think she has a pill addiction?

hard to tell about the pills, she told the friend I tried to be fair told Steve he could have this and that but he wanted it all. she then told the friend her father has given to 10-12k since June, what the hell is she spending this money on, I give her money as well plus she works!!!
Mel, Does this sound like its over?
do I use all the evidence I have or let her know I have it but not use it, she laughed to my friend when she said my ex best friends wife was going to be sopeneaed. Wife does not know I will get all her evidence she had against him.

Steve, I have seen too many marriages reconcile around here from WORSE circumstances than yours. And I have seen others than seemed hopeful, fall apart. So you just can never tell.

I would give your attorney all the evidence you have and try to get custody of your girls. I would tell him to actively pursue custody. It is very disconcerting to think that she has those girls and has been abusing pain killers and denigrating their father to them. That is sick emotional abuse.

the court date is set for April 14th, should I have it postponed until a later date? There are so many things she thinks I am doing that I am not, do I try and get my friend to tell her what she is saying is not true, that i have not said or done what she has accused me of.

Steve, I wouldn't postpone anything and I wouldn't try to get your friend to convince her of anything. I don't think the truth sounds like it is an important matter to her anyway. She just wants to demonize you and is making herself look foolish in the process. That is probably why all your friends are saying "poor Steve." No one serious will fall for her nonsense.

I thought I read where Harley says to postpone the Divorce if this is not what you want. draw it out?
would this help or hurt, April 14 is 6 weeks away.

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