About ten years ago my DH "experimented" with two of our daughters. There were a few touching incedences.

They didn't tell me about it for several years and then when they did he insisted that they were lying about it, blowing things out of porportion... Had false memories...

I went didn't want to believe he'd do these things. I couldn't immagine he'd harm them when he had been such a devoted father.

Two years ago I decided that the girls weren't lying and kicked him out of the house.

They are adults at this point and there were no other children in danger.

He hasn't done anything with anyone elses kids or has he had access.

I think he was drunk and high and not thinking right. He admitted part of what happened last year and I'm in the middle of trying to give him another chance.

I'm not able to forgive him.

He is still having internet porn problems and is now into chats and webcams. Which I see as a progession to another affair.

He won't see any counselors becaue they threaten him with legal procceedings.

My girls don't want to be drug through this again. We have been investigated and he convinced social services that they were lying.

He feels horriable about himself and is being very self destructive.

My family is torn appart.

Is there any hope for a situation like this?

Am I just wasting my time trying to keep this marriage going?

How do I heal? I still love this person and don't want to hurt him.

locogurl,

As a survivor of sexual abuse at the hands of my father....there was only one thing that I could NEVER ever understand...and that was how my mother took him back after what he did. It was harder to get over that...then to get over the abuse....because I loved HER so very much. I never really could ever forgive her for it....finally right before she died....we did manage to get through the pain and find peace. If your husband is still exhibiting sexually addictive behavior....I beg you to separate until he is willing to undergo extensive therapy (my father was in for almost ten years)...he eventually left my mother right before she died, for his nurse. This situation is only hopeless if you continue to enable his destructive behavior by not defending your boundaries. Sexual addiction, especially one that has involved children is a deal breaker for almost everyone. Blaming it on alchohol is a huge cop out. It may remove his inhibitions....but it doesn't create those kind of interests. Wake up and smell the coffee....this man has a serious problem. So sorry I can't be more encouraging...my heart truly goes out to you.