The final should be filed today!

Are you sad? Or happy?

believer:

"Glad to hear from you again. Have you heard anything else from the one you are married to?"

Well put.

Brett. Just be careful. Do this RIGHT.

-ol' 2long

relieved.

Brett -

It is so strange. I have been thinking about things the last couple of days. When we started here, you were afraid your wife was going to divorce you.

Spiderslayer was afraid that her WH would never come back.

I was in Plan B with WH living with OW.

2long is in recovery and hoping to make marriage work.

Now you are relieved that you are soon to be divorced. Spiderslayer is back with her husband. 2long is still trying to reconcile, and I am still in Plan B, with WH and OW living together.

It is kind of interesting how things change. I still think your wife may be back asking for more chances. I hope you are preparing yourself for that.

I have completely changed although my situation is the same. I am even letting WH retire without divorcing him.

So I will stop rambling. If you are divorced, now you CAN fling yourself into the abyss. But always remember that we are here for you.

Yes it is strange how things have turned out(somewhat). I turned to this site and the people here hoping to save my M. I'm growing as a person in so many ways. I now know who I am and what I want in an R. I know quite a bit more on how an M is to be successful. I've learned that I do belong, I am a good guy. My M was far gone a long time ago. I lacked the tools and self esteem to do anything about it. I still need work in those areas and will continue to do so.

The gal I met is willing to wait for me to get through everything that I have to work on before we can consider anything serious. She says I'm one in a million and will wait however long it takes. Yes she does know that there is the possibility the X will want to come back. I don't know what I'll do/say when and if that happens. I just know that right now I'm not wanting that. I can't move on and I can't fix me with her in my life anymore. I never let go of the past betrayals and hurt. Thought I did, but upon self reflection during those nights in the garage made me realize I did not.

Hooey and that gal I met looks real good in bib overalls and can chew ta-back-ee with the best of them. She even has all her own teeth. She comes from a wealthy family too! They've got a double wide and two pickups.later gator...

Brett:

I've got a refrigerator magnet given 2 me by a friend formerly from Idaho.

It's got a pic2re of 2 guys and 2 dogs in a pickup truck. The caption reads:

"Idaho double date"

-ol' 2long

hahaha! That's rich!

Ya'll are making me laugh too hard.

Been busy getting the hotrod ready to go drag racing tomorrow! Been awhile since I've run it down the quarter mile.

My gal pal is going along. I'm packin' a reeel nice lunch. Pork rinds, beef jerky and chitluns. And a couple of mason jars of my finest. should be a good time.

Good for you, Brett. You deserve to have a good time. Does your friend have a name? Also have you met her kids? Do you like kids? And my last nosey question is how old is she?

No, I haven't met her 2 kids. That is for much later. I had to ask my sister on that one. She is a single mom w/3 kids. Her advice was to not meet the kids until there is something long term between us. It wouldn't be fair to the kids. I'm a young at heart kinda guy so it bode well for me that she is only 26. Nine year difference there. Her name is Eileen. Don't mind you being nosey at all. It feels good to talk about someone I care alot about.

Brett -

Well then, more questions. Is she a Christian? Are you still going to church and to counseling? What is her situation with the kid's dad? Sorry to sound like your mother.

Just wanted to say I feel your pain, I am the WW who's H had a affair and moved out in March and has been back and forth 6 times now he has finally moved out again last Wednesday after receving info OW was served with divorce papers. My H has been playing the game, home for a week and out for a week, back and forth until I've reached a point of no return. My sons 16 @ 18 now have no respect for their father which just kills me inside. I see my H making such a hugh mistake, OW walked out on H and 3 kids moved into townhouse with my H which of course he pays for and all utilities, so what's not to love right?
He tells me "It's over", "He must leave", "this isn't working for him" and of course he doesn't THINK he loves me, not sure what he wants. I will be filing for divorce next week, can't play the game anymore. I am so hurt that the pain goes through my body daily. Your point about the song hit home with me, I recently have been following the old say "God please give me Serenity" which is what I am searching. I need the strength to continue and be strong for my boys and I am struggling. I am 44 years old and find myself in a position of starting over and taking control of raising two teenagers, maintaining a home and lawn alone, which was not the plan. I truely resent him for putting my and my boys in this position because of his selfish acts of feeling the need for new and different sex., we were married 22 years and very happy until this women came along with all her sad tales and stories., he feel hook line and sinker,
she feed him all the lines and he ran after her like a little kid. He's about the lose alot and doesn't realize what he had., so my thoughts are with you, it's the most difficult thing in the world to deal with, losing the person you love is horrible. I can only hope I find strength out of all this when it's over. Hang in there you are not alone.

Sorry to hear that you are in such pain. I leaned real hard on God for strength. It kept me standing, when I hadn't the will to do so. This could be a learning experience for your teens..how to take care of the house,lawn,etc. I didn't have a home of my own for 14yrs after I moved away from my folks. Now I lean on what my father had me doing back then. By the way I didn't enjoy it back then. But I'm grateful for that now.

Yes, she is a christian. She doesn't attend church regularly. Not in a long time anyway. But we had a discussion about "The Passion." And she felt it changed her a great deal and would like to find a church to attend. I myself haven't been in a few weeks. Again tomorrow I'll miss out. I keep in touch with those concerned within my church. Don't know when it would be appropriate to invite her to go. I know she'd like it and would be well received. Just don't know about the timing. Will have to ask my Pastor about that one.

I have IC sessions scheduled all the way through May, every tuesday. I like shocking my counselor with my radical honesty. Not used to it. I guess. I don't beat around the bush, nor do I like to hide anything. Well gotta catch a jet. Seeya..

Brett-

Start attending church together. It doesn't have to be your church, any church will do. I think that is the best thing for the two of you. That will help you like nothing else.

Brett:

I had a lot of fun with "measured honesty" versus "radical honesty" almost 2 years ago now. My IC at the time was a proponent of measured honesty. When you get the chance, look up the thread here:

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=37;t=017551

Pepperband had a similar thread going at about the same time. If I can find it I'll point you 2 it here (it might be listed in my thread, come 2 think of it).

best,
-ol' 2long

2long-

I think Brett is out racing his hotrod and having a picnic lunch. Hopefully we will hear from him again.

Spiderslayer seems to have dropped off the boards to work on recovery.

believer:

Their loss, huh! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Time for a vir2al picnic, I think!

-ol' 2long

2long -

I guess it is just you and me guy. How are you doing in Plan B?