I have been lurking here for a while and getting some great information. First I will say I am truly sorry that we all have to meet under these circumstances.
I am a BS, married for over 10 years to what used to be a wonderful man. Last April I found out he was talking via cellphone to a much younger woman that he has contact with at work. Confronted him and he got defensive and of course turned it around on me. We went to MC but he lied his way through all that - tried to start over then ended up in Sept finding out he had a seperate email account that he was using to talk to women he didn't now on the internet and his password was ilovekbn (the girl from works initials) -- I found out about 2 weeks into the mess (funny how God shows us things). Well I was leaving but due to having a 9 year old, me not working outside the home, homeschooling and just the total not being able to function thing I stayed. Thought things were getting better but if I ever mention the emotional affair he had he blows up -
I have continued IC and decided all I could do was work on myself, I can't change him and I can't let him drag me down. Found out last night that he is continuing to lie to me - though they haven't talked in months she has called him 3 times since Jan 29th and he has called her once. I once again have had my belly full and can't see any hope in this marriage, but don't have the strength to move just yet, but I will get things moving. I have told him it is over and that I have been lied to for a year - he cries and says he is calling our pastor, etc to get the help he needs. I honestly hope he does get help -- in the end he will be a lonely old man if he goes like he is going. What kills me is he never was a liar -- don't know where my husband went but I am not living with this man I don't know. I know God works miracles but I honestly don't see how I can ever trust him again.

Sorry this is long -- a advice is GREATLY appreciated -- I was totally blindsided -- I have been living on a rollercoaster from hell and I am bringing it to a screeching halt because I hate rollercoasters.

<small>[ February 11, 2004, 07:23 AM: Message edited by: NotsopeachyinGA ]</small>

NotsopeachyinGA --

I bumped this post in recovery for you. It may help you a bit. post on Recovery Board

<small>[ February 11, 2004, 08:13 AM: Message edited by: way2 ]</small>

notsopeachy-

Welcome to marriage builders. I'm glad you've gone from lurking to posting. I did the same thing.

If you have been reading here, you should see that WS's are all alike. They lie, hide things, change the history of the marriage, etc. Your H is not the person you married.

You sound like a dedicated wife and mom. I hope you will decide to give the MB program a try. Many people have saved their marriages and ended up with a better marriage.