Thanks for the responses to my post yesterday, still working on the letter and will let you all see what will probably be the final revision tomorrow. But I have another question for you. Actually I need advice. Forgive my lack of use of acronymns in the following narrative as I want to make sure I'm being exactly clear.
Ok, Yesterday my BS text messaged me on my phone (how she figured it out I'll never know.. she's not very technical) asking if we could talk yesterday. I responded back with "About what". She responded with "Visitation, child support, dissolution, court news... etc...
So I called her when I got back to the office and took my lunch break. We talked for a while and I learned a few things during the course of our conversation. 1st of all, we are having a huge dificulty communicating. It tends to break down rather quickly and edges towards conflict. She made the statement that I say things and don't even realize I'm tearing her heart out when I do. This has me concerned. I'm afraid that I'm dropping love busters without realizing them and causing an even bigger negative balance in her love bank.
What advice I'd like to ask for would be tips on communicating and minimizing the love busters that can occur thru communicating incorrectly or not effectively.
I'd also like tips on dealing with the fog thats created for BS's who have their emotions swing from "I love her so much, please let her forgive me" to "If she doesn't want to be with me then fine, end it for gods sakes" There are times when I am at peace and I do have a measure of serenity though. But the other times when I get on the emotional roller coaster I have a hard time getting off.
Last thing to note is that I called our MC (got his secretary) who we went to before I told the truth about the affair and explained whats happened since we stopped coming abruptly. I spoke with his wife (his secretary) and asked that he call me as I wanted to know if he would be willing to call and speak with my BS and ask if she was willing to at least come in and discuss our marriage, be it a joint session with oth of us or her alone with the MC. I fell asleep before he returned my call yesterday, but he left a message and I will return his call today. Do you think this is a good idea?
-2soon
