Believer, i am so happy for you. Really joyful.

I had a long talk again with WH. Will post later in my thread. he is out now with a friend who is trying to help. Please every one, pray for the spirit to talk to him.

Well, I am not the one to talk about Plan A and Plan B. My WH did come by today and we had a good talk about finincial matters.

Then we took a ride on the Harley. We went down the ocean and then screamed up the freeway. It was nice.

THINGS THAT MAKE YOU SAY HHHMMMMMMMM...........


HHHMMMMM LOST BIRD?

"Have you iniated NO CONTACT with your OW??"

And if not...
Have you communicated your decision not to do so with your wife?"

hhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

ARK

Lost Bird,

I ditto what ark is asking. Where are you with the OW vs your wife?

Have you chosen? Which direction?

Are you home now? Almost sounds like you might be. Although, as ark would say,

Hmmmmmmm. If you had gone home you probably would have told us.

I would hate to think after all this time that you are still sitting on the fence. Are you?

What does your doctor say about this?

Time for a full and complete update, Lost Bird.

Lost Bird,
Has your BS exposed your A to the light of day?

Does OW's family, friends, church, co-workers, etc. know about her immoral behavior? How about yours?

Hmmmm...perhaps it time....seems to me your BS has nothing left to lose!

All:

Yes, the NC letter has been sent and we are venturing down the road to recovery. Thanks to all who have been so supportive with words of encouragement and the prodding that was needed at times.

LB

LB, I am very excited to hear your news. Good luck in your recovery. I read all you posts, it took you long way to get to this point. Your W is super, and patient. She loves you so much. Please take goo care of her.

Meanwhile, I need your help from you point of view. My Wh said that he doesn't love me, and he doesn't feel that I love him. He sent me an e-mail telling me he still wanted a D, but today he is talking to SH. Please read my tread in Plan A/Plan B about our conversation, and telling what he might be thinking in his head. If possible, in his point of view, how does he expect me to act. Thanks a lot.

Great News!!

Now the WORK begins!! Be patient with each other and above all LOVING! It will come back to you!

I believe you will find that the world is once again a wonderful place....

May you find peace at last.

glad to hear about the NC letter LB, have you started a new thread?

Lostbird - Are you going to start doing phone counseling like the Harley's and Penny?

I think I see a new career opportunity for you.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by lostnhurt:
<strong> Your W is super, and patient. She loves you so much.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes, I do. I love him very, very, very much. He is becoming, once again, the man I remember.

Keep the faith, guys and gals!

IS girl - Where is your thread? I don't want to threadjack, but lostbird has really helped me. I took his advice and talked to my WS about his retirement plans sympathetically.

Then WHAM - everything changed. My WS is now going to retire. He also said he was very sorry for the way our marriage has gone, and wants to reconcile. Of course OW is still in the picture, but I no longer want his life to keep spiraling down.

So lostbird really made a difference in our marriage. I don't know where it will lead, but I am happy and WS is ecstatic.

Believer:
I am thrilled with your news. A WS is a lot like an aircraft carrier -- you don't turn one very quickly. It takes some time and space.

Just the same, glad to hear all the positive news but sorry the OW is still in the picture. Keep a positive attitude, be thankful for the progress made but protect yourself.

Next time you talk to the H, throw out the idea of celebrating the retirement together with a nice trip. Get away somewhere special, somewhere where the two of you always wanted to go. The time alone will be good for you. You deserve it.

And about that phone counseling gig -- I seriously doubt it. But thanks for the compliment -- you threw me into some pretty heavy company there. Those folks are pretty smart. I'm just a guy trying to get by.

LB

Lostnhurt:

Thanks for the note but sorry to learn of your problems. I read your thread on A/B and you, like most here, have travelled too far on this roller coaster. Stay strapped in though and keep your chin and outlook up.

I was glad to hear your H is a good father. That's a positive. However, he is quite fog bound since he is telling you on one hand that he wants a D, then makes and keeps an appointment with SH on the other. That tells me something. Trust me, I doubt he made an appointment with SH for amusement or sport.

He's torn and doesn't know where to turn. Don't expect an overnight miracle from the session with SH. Pray for some insight. At this early stage, if your H can start thinking clearly, progress will have been made. Don't force the issue -- there's little you can do at this point -- but when you talk next, politely ask him how the appointment went. If he doesn't want to discuss it, drop the subject. Just crack open the door for discussion, perhaps he will open up. Let him share what he wants to share with you.

Good luck. I don't know if I have helped.

LB

Lost Bird, that is really excellent news. I know you may have felt that some of us have been on your butt at times, but everything you posted led us to believe that you truly wanted to try for a recovery. We just wanted to get you moving. Sorry for our lack of patience, and congratulations.

23down:

Thanks for the note and most of all the patience and encouragement that you and others offered. Oh there were days when a post here or there really rubbed a raw nerve or two. I could have kept the moderators busy with the editing, deleting or whatever those gnomes really do.

Some, like me, are just stubborn or slow learners. It takes just a little longer for some to put aside the noise, think clearly and find the right path.

Sadly, three lives, perhaps more, were negatively impacted in this mess. An A tangles and strangles. But unlike the two involved in the A, the BS is the real victim with so say so in the what transpired at all.

Enough rambling and babbling for now. Time to move on. Time to heal. Time to find inner peace and shared love.

Best to all.

LB (a little less lost than yesterday)

So lostbird...were you not going to tell us and let us keep hammering ya... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

And about the hammering you got around here...
minor stuff...and you wore it well....

Life holds no garuntees for any of us....
it is precoious and scary at all times....

Godspeed on your journey home....

ARK

i am so glad to hear you are back with W. You give me hope.

I prayed for the best in your recovery.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

LB, thank you for your insight. I asked him to talk to SH long time ago, he finally did yesterday. At first he said he will talk to him for 10 min, but they ended up using the whole hour.

I asked him how he felt about the conversation and SH, he said no much feeling. What is that?

He just called me and told me that he forgot his cellphone. If I need to reach him, call his work. But he even did not answer my call couple days ago. I know I have to be patient. Thanks for your help. I may come back to ask for more help.

Wish you the best recovery. Please take super care of your W.

lB-

You have made my day!

I am SO proud of you.