Should we have WS read SAA book if the are willing to? I don't know if my WH would but if I thought it would help I would certainly try. Is this a no no? Please advise. Thanks.

I am no expert, and I hope star checks in here soon with you, or another veteran, but I would say No. I have tried to "educate" my WH, and it is an LB to him. He does not want to be educated, especially by me.

That is my experience, and something that ClearSkies told me when I first posted here. She is a veteran member. I haven't heard from her in a while, but if you look on page 1 of my "Separated and he has emotionally divorced me" thread on Just Found Out, you will see what she said to me.

Now in the future if he asks, you can happily hand it over. But that will not be tomorrow, I can just about guarantee. Educate YOU. Take care of YOU. Let him and the OW try and take care of WH. He is not your concern at this point, unless he initiates or asks. I believe that is what the 180 list says.

You can only make love deposits when you are invited to. If you force, it is an LB. Make any sense? It didn't to me until this week, so if not, it is OK. I think some of this stuff just takes some time to sink in. For our brains to process. It does not seem natural, but it works.

Hugs! Amy