Okay,

Read this. My FWS??? reply to email exGF sent.

Yes this is THE FWSname, you qave reached the right(FWS name), what a surprise to hear from you. How did you find me. I lived in ***********from 1981-1985. I marrried and have a girl who is 18 now. I've played in a Latin Band for 15 years. We have played coast to coast, from New York to Texas. Tell me about your family. It is real nice to hear from you. Tell me about your family.

So this is the email FWS replied to after 3 emails and 27 minutes of music.

What is your take on this? I am real mad. Said I read your email and want a D.

Love in Christ,
Miss M

<small>[ February 29, 2004, 04:35 AM: Message edited by: Miss M ]</small>

To most this would appear to be a harmless e-mail. What else do you have to make you suspect more?

I think you are throwing in the towel without enough evidence. You c/b right or your could have just misunderstood. Can't tell right now. Can you?

I would never threaten D unless you were prepared to make it a reality. Otherwise the BS teaches the WS to learn how to manipulate the family.

L.

<small>[ February 29, 2004, 07:20 PM: Message edited by: Orchid ]</small>

Thanks Orchid for the reality check.

I guess I had a little reaction without thinking about the consequences. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" />

It is just all so hard sometimes. The reaction was out of fear.

Thank you.

Love in Christ,
Miss M

Ugh.Why on earth does he have to know about an exgf family? I know that WH was close to the father? I think but geeze.After all you've been through and the fact that your WH knows how this upsets you,well,I would be mad too.

It is very painful when your feelings don't seem to matter to the one you love most.This is just an example."It is real nice to hear from you"???

Well,Orchid does have a point.Like I mentioned before,if the father figure was the most important reason that he may want to know about from the exgf,then she should be able to let him know his status and then your WH should then explain how he cannot correspond with her anymore as it upsets you.

Most,if not all, women with no hidden agenda would understand the complexities and feelings of opposite sex relationships and she should bow out gracefully if she has a moral,caring and decent heart.If she keeps up with the contact then beware.I think your FWH just took a step onto that slippery slope.I hope he can get off in time.

I'm sorry if this sounds like a downer but for one thing,I would never in my dreams ever consider contacting an old boyfriend while I was married. The xgf motives have yet to be understood too.The other thing is it would be too easy to say,"Oh,I'm sure this means nothing".Just keep expressing how you feel,ok?

You will know you are really ready for D when you don't even have to think about telling WH.You will just walk down to the lawyers office,get the paper's filed and hit him right between the eyes.

O

Octobergirl,

Thanks for your reply. I am not going to D my H.

In hindsight I realize it was a reaction to my own fears, and I had a lot of triggers going on. This whole thing has brought up a lot of not so good memories, and I was thinking that I just can't go thru any of this again.

I reacted instead of stepping back from the situation and thinking about what would be the healthiest thing to do for me, marriage and family. I've always been a big advocate for stepping back from the situation before you act, or act out, like I did yesterday.

My marriage is really good. My H is the H I always dreamed of having. He is very good to me and supportive. He has come so far since his A and I really couldn't ask for more.

Thank you for your support, and for validating how I feel about these things. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> It is just that it is never the same. I wouldn't want it to be the same. I am just overprotective of our relationship.

By the way, ex gf emailed back, very very long. Told my H to tell me not to be upset, just an old lady curious about how things were, and wasn't even sure if he remembered her.

I don't know what to think. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

I have a lot of stress going on in my life outside of this and overreacted. We will see how this pans out.

Thanks again!!!

Love in Christ,
Miss M

Hmmm.Well,I still have my skeptic hat on but you do what YOU feel is best Miss M.I really hope that it does turn out to be nothing of importance,I really do.Good luck to you.

O

Have a need to know whats going on ? How are you feeling ?