Well my WH came by tonight to talk again about reconciliation. I told him to prepare for getting D papers before our anniversary at the end of March.

He said if I just would let him move back in, that he would work hard on the marriage. I told him that as long as OW is in the picture, time for D.

He said he is having financial problems. I told him to tell OW that she better get a job. I told him I have given up on marriage, that I will move on, and he needs to also. He just needs to tell his soulmate to get a job.

Anyway it went on and on. He still (in his fog) thinks that we will get back together again. I told him that I cannot afford to let things go like they are. He told me to have my kids (who are students) get a job. I told him that I am working, he is working, my kids are students, why can't OW go to work to help him. Then I burst out laughing. Sorrry, I am so tired of this.

Laughter is the best medicine. So I've heard. I always feel better after a good guffaw. Hope you are well..

believer, that was some serious lovebusting, Madam! What did he say about the status of the OW?

melody- He said she could be gone. The same stuff he has been telling me for the last 8 months.

Believer -

I am just so grateful that you burst out laughing and not burst out crying. I am so proud of your laughter.

I think he deserves it if he is going to continue to bother you. Good grief. Get a clue!

I hope and pray my man is not as dense as yours, no offense. Your man is NUTS to be giving you up.

You rock! Amy

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by believer:
<strong> ....Anyway it went on and on. He still (in his fog) thinks that we will get back together again. I told him that I cannot afford to let things go like they are. He told me to have my kids (who are students) get a job. I told him that I am working, he is working, my kids are students, why can't OW go to work to help him. Then I burst out laughing. Sorrry, I am so tired of this. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Ha! I don't see an LB here. Yea, after a while the only emotion working is laughing. So sad it's silly. I did that also. The WS looked so hurt and I was just laughing. Even my apology came out between bursts of laughter. I told my WS that just thinking of them together was now funny but please go ahead and be with the OW. I told him he was now acting as dumb as her and to me it was hysterical. Boy did that feel good.

So don't beat yourself up. I don't see an LB. Must have my MB blinders on. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

L.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I can imagine myself in your shoes laughing. I understand why you burst out laughing. It is very ridiculous the way they act.

But you did say that he said OW would be gone right?...did he say that or not?

listen baby...(jamaican accent) he's gonna have to be SERVED! soon. You're wasting your time it seems. I mean "DAMN"! he's completely out of this world. It's like talking to a crazy person.

HUGS LUV YOU (cuz you keep me sane) lol

Yes I would laugh too

Thanks everyone. Yes he said (for the umpteenth time) that OW would be gone. He has continually said she would be gone for the last year. But she is never gone.

My biggest problem is that I am running out of money. H has given me no money for the last year. He blows his money on OW. When I discuss it with him, he tells me to get another job, that my sons need to pitch in with more money, or I should borrow money from my parents.

It was just so funny to me. He never considers asking OW to work. She has never worked since she has been with her H. Now she is not living with her H anymore and still is not working.

So anyway the whole thing is very amusing to me now.

I think you handled it great. It sounds like he's still all talk and no action. Tell him that's what you need, action. What are your expectations from him?

I really have no expectations. I have moved on and am enjoying life. He has Plan B letter. He knows what he needs to do, but does not want to do it.

That is what is so nice about Plan B. After awhile the BS is not hurt anymore by the WS's actions. Even though my Plan B was not all that perfect, it has been a lifesaver.

Hi believer,

I had a little chuckle too when I read your first post.You know,I bet your WH will still be saying what he did even in front of the judge! It's like, "If you would just let me back in again,I will work on our marriage" BEEP, this is a recording. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I'm sorry though nonetheless.I was wondering if you had started any D proceedings yet.Plan B is great isn't it? Saved my bacon a couple months ago.Anyway,just thinking of you.Keep that head held high.

O <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

<small>[ March 04, 2004, 10:16 AM: Message edited by: Octobergirl ]</small>

Beliver,

I just read your post. I am so sorry that I concentrate on my own problem so much, i haven't look around. You handle it so well. I am proud of you. Did you say Plan B is easier? I am so hurt now. I really don't Plan B is good for me. H already talking about moving out. If he move, i will let go.

IMO you should add another condition to "coming back"....he returns all the money that should have been in the marriage for the last year. Less maybe a small allowance for trifles and hobbies such as the ow.

I agree laughter is very healthy when it comes from a realization of how ludicrous people (or even ourselves) can be....it is the vacination of choice against depression....seeing the humor in our human foibles....and not letting life suck us into a black hole.

Just a thought -- he is good at saying OW will be gone, how about putting some teeth into it? Ask him to move across the country, get away from OW physically.

He never actually does anything, just makes promises. Moving would be doing something.

The problem is I don't care what he does. My life is going fine. He has a pattern of coming around every 8 days and then disappearing again. So now I don't have to worry about him for another 8 days. Hopefully I'll have stopped laughing by then.

Hi 'Believer'.
Whenever I read your messages, I see a new much more self-confident person than your earlier posts.
I think of the lyrics to this song when I think of you!
Love, Julie

"I WILL SURVIVE"

At first I was afraid.
I was petrified.
I kept thinking I could never live
Without you by my side.
But then I spent so many nights
Just thinking how you’d done me wrong.
I grew strong.
I learned how to get along.

And so you’re back from outer space.
I just walked in to find you here
With that sad look upon your face.
I should have changed my f***ing lock.
I would have made you leave your key
If I’d have known for just one second
You’d be back to bother me.

Oh now go.
Walk out the door.
Just turn around now.
You’re not welcome anymore.
Weren’t you the one
Who tried to break me with goodbye?
Did you think I’d crumble?
Did you think I’d lay down and die?
Oh not I.

I will survive.
As long as I know how to love
I know I’ll be alive.
I’ve got all my life to live.
I’ve got all my love to give.
I will survive.
I will survive.

It took all the strength I had
Just not to fall apart.
I’m trying hard to mend
The pieces of my broken heart.
And I spent oh so many nights
Just feeling sorry for myself.
I used to cry.
But now I hold my head up high.

And you’ll see me with somebody new.
I’m not that stupid little person
Still in love with you.
And so you thought you’d just drop by,
And you expect me to be free.
But now I’m saving all my lovin’
For someone who’s lovin’ me.

Oh now go.
Walk out the door.
Just turn around now.
You’re not welcome anymore.
Weren’t you the one
Who tried to break me with desire?
Did you think I’d crumble?
Did you think I’d lay down and die?
Oh not i.

I will survive.
As long as I know how to love
I know I’ll be alive.
I’ve got all my life to live.
I’ve got all my love to give.
I will survive.
I will survive.

<small>[ March 04, 2004, 09:39 AM: Message edited by: Blessed TIME ]</small>

This is a good one.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">He just needs to tell his soulmate to get a job.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Oh, Believer, I'm cracking up here! That is just classic!!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Guess who, Believer?

I'll give you a hint.

Yesterday I pulled myself up by my Birkenstock straps for the last time, and now I am Spider Slayer.

I'll give you 3 guesses, and the first 2 don't count. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

SS - I almost signed my name! Geez. I feel like a superhero now. Triple 0-7!! Oh, that's a spy. Oh well. You know what I mean.