Well, I am so hurt that my husband wasn't there for me or called to inquire about my breast ultrasound 2 days ago. He knows I am possibly facing cancer and I am crushed.

I am so angry that he is proving that he doesn't love me. Yes, he told me he didn't love me numerous times over the past months, but somehow I didn't believe him or refused to believe him. Although my love for him is seemingly endless, I am worried about the effects of his silence on my love for him. Time for Plan B?

Plan B letter? His affair is done and has been since October 20, 2003. I know he has been meeting women when he is out with friends after work. That is driving me nuts because 2 of them put their cell phone numbers in his cell phone. I, of course, wrote down the numbers and called both of them to tell him he is married and to stay away from him, don't call him or they will haev to deal with me. They both denied anything romantic, but I didn't care. I know about the lies much better after all I've discovered in the past months.

I think I did a good Plan A when he would "let" me. I gave him everything I had physically and emotionally - just to get crapped on. He said he was just a weak man when it came to letting me give him SF during our separation. Puh-leeze.

Now his silence during my health crisis is making me so sad. I need him. I want to share this trying time with my husband. No matter how mad I was at him, if he was in the midst of a health crisis, I would put aside any feelings of hate I had to be with him and make sure he was healthy and getting the proper medical advice and treatment. I guess I just expect too much of someone who promised me forever.

We are scheduled to have our taxes done this Saturday morning. I am not going to call him to remind him - I am just going to our appointment with or without him. I am going to look good and not wear my engagement/wedding rings. I am going to wear another ring on my wedding hand so he knows I just didn't forget to put them on. I will have my overnight bag in the back seat of my car and keep looking at my watch during the appointment as if I have to be somewhere at a certain time. I will then be unavailable for the rest of the weekend should he try to call my cell phone for anything (not that he does now).

I think this will get to him a little bit. Maybe. I remember Carol's post on doing something similar to her WH. It sure worked.

Yesterday I told my girlfriend who betrayed my trust by telling my husband some things I told her in confidence that someone asked me on a date (a lie). She encouraged me to go. Can you believe it?? I also told her "he" wanted to take me to lunch this Saturday (see my plan???). I wonder if she will NOW keep her trap shut to my husband. Probably will when I want her to tell him that!

Anyway, I guess a Plan B letter is in my near future. I will post it here before it is sent for the approval of the MB experts!

Have a good day, everyone!

Bumping for some good advice from the experts!

Help! I am getting nervous for tomorrow. Below is my plan:

"We are scheduled to have our taxes done this Saturday morning. I am not going to call him to remind him - I am just going to our appointment with or without him. I am going to look good and not wear my engagement/wedding rings. I am going to wear another ring on my wedding hand so he knows I just didn't forget to put them on. I will have my overnight bag in the back seat of my car and keep looking at my watch during the appointment as if I have to be somewhere at a certain time. I will then be unavailable for the rest of the weekend should he try to call my cell phone for anything (not that he does now).

I think this will get to him a little bit. Maybe. I remember Carol's post on doing something similar to her WH. It sure worked."

Can someone please give me advice on whether this plan will be painfully obvious to my husband? Does it look too pathetic?

Any insight you guys can provide is greatly appreciated!

I'm probably not the person to be giving advice, because I'm working hard to try and get my own act together, but just a couple thoughts.

First, if you put all those things together (the missing ring, the overnight case, the looking at the watch), you'll have to be a better actor than I am to pull it off. Depending on how intuitive he is, he might see through it. Might be better to just leave at at "unavailable during the weekend" and just let him wonder, without all the other props.

However, I DID take my wedding ring off shortly after my WH's A started, and I have NOT put it on since. I'm not sure he noticed, but I'm doing it to make my own point. Right now the vows are broken, and thus the ring is staying off.

Second, just want you to know that you must be very strong (stronger than you might think you are) to be dealing with this and a potential health issue as well as you are. I do hope all turns out well on that one. The A is enough of an issue to have to deal with.

LL