Hello everyone,

It's been a little over two weeks since I have posted.Some of you may remember that my WH decided to end his A and reconcile with me,which he did mid February.We have been home together for two and a half weeks and it has been hard but also some good.WH is one month into NC with OW/HW and from all appearances he seems to be holding up alright.

However,this past week has been difficult.He came home initially wanting to shower me with affection but I just couldn't handle that right off the bat so I made him keep some distance and he understood but this week he says he is not feeling like he loves me more than friends.But like Sue in SAA,I know these feelings will come and go with time.He did feel "In love" feelings when he first came home.

We continue to see our counselor every two weeks and I have been lurking here almost everyday,reading.I needed to take a break from MB and concentrate on my WH but I do miss helping people here.I aked my WH to consider posting his story here at some point because I think it would help him but also that it may help to have him/WH( a rarity) on this board to hopefully give some insight into what he was feeling,etc.

I'm sorry to see so many still struggling with WS's.As I reflect on my newfound position in this A, I am saddened at how truly horrific an A really is on just so many levels,before,during and after.It is just so ...profound that it is a wonder that any good can come of it afterward.But,that is what my WH and I are hopeful for.We do have a plan.I only wish that the severity of this "epidemic" were taken more seriously.It reminds me of how Infidelity is glamourized in the movies and it sickens me(think: Bridges of Madison County,The English Patient,etc).

I am in a difficult place,a different place now.One that is no less uncertain and scary.What will the future hold,will there ever be contact again,what will I find,will we make it? This week I feel like I am the one towing the line and WH and I have a lot to rediscover about each other and how to communicate better but I am up for it.I will probably post more on the Recovery board from here on in but I will always check back to see how everyone else is doing.This board was a life saver when I needed it.So,I know that I need to give back to those who may just beginning their own painful journey.

God Bless us all.

O

Thank you Octobergirl for those of us who have just started this rollercoaster ride it's good to hear about efferts to reconcile. It gives those of us who see no hope encouragement to stay strong and hold on to hope. I wish you and your H all the luck in the world.

o

Thanks for the update, I was wondering what happened to you. I haven't heard from you in a while. I am glad things are going good for you, and I am scared of recovery, if I ever get there. I am so glad for you that you are there. I hope and pray for you to carry on with a wonderful life and have lots of love. You have helped me tons in the past here we all appreciate you. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

NY

Good to hear from you, Octobergirl. I've been thinking about you and figured things were probably going okay. I know it takes lots of work and am glad you are hanging in there.

It reminded me that my Wh bought the book and movie of The Bridge of the Madison County in Dec. How sick.

Thanks all.

John,

I don't know your whole story,yet,but I do wish the best for you too.I will try to find your story.

Hopeful,

You have grown! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> I like how strong you sound.So much better than weeks ago.Glad to hear it.

Believer,

I often wonder how you are doing.Are you still going to D? Or more Plan B? You are the Plan B queen.

Lost,

I know you have seen your share of pain.I am going to catch up on your story.I hope you are still hanging in there too.I know Clint Eastwood did a fine job of making Infidelity seem so right on screen but his own marital life has been pretty interesting too,I might add. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

O

Octobergirl,

I won't say much - I'm more of a wimp than the others and have done a lousy job with my situation up to this point.

But it is GREAT to hear things are so good with you. I do pray they will continue and that you guys will have a better marriage in the future than you could ever have dreamed.

LL