1) My divorce judgement was issued on March 19th, so I will officially be divorced in 31 days, or by April 19th. Things are finally at an end.

2) I have bought myself a nice townhouse to live in, and will no longer have to live in an apartment (while my H still lives in our huge dream home). I take posession of it about a week after the divorce is final, which is good, so then my H won't have any "dowry" rights to my property.

3) My H has finally figured out that we are indeed divorcing and that there's no point in trying to contact me all the time, trying to guilt me into going over to see him and have sex with him. I haven't heard a peep out of him in nearly a month now.

4) I get a week's vacation next week.

5) And thankfully I'm not as ashamed of my divorced status as I once was. I know that I fought hard for my marriage for 1 1/2 years before I made the choice to end the marriage. I know that I did all that I could. I am at peace with myself. So, I've also found the courage to start telling work colleagues and friends who didn't know.

So life is good! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I'm so much happier by myself right now than I was in the middle of my marital turmoil. I know it's odd to post a divorce success story on here, but I guess that's what I've become.

Sometimes it is better to get out of an unhealthy relationship that is going nowhere, than to continually try to marriage build by yourself.

Jen

Good job, Jen.

Is it possible to sever ALL contact?? If so, don't you think that would be best??

WAT

Indeed wat, to sever all contact is best. When I move I am going to get a new phone number, and probably also make sure that it is unlisted. I won't be informing my H of where I move to, and I'll be making it clear to mutual friends that I don't wish for him to be informed of my new whereabouts. Really, if there is anything important that he has to contact me about, eg. illness in his family, he can call my parents and they can call me.

Jen

Jen Brown,

There is a time for everything. This is the time for you to rebuild and rechart your life.

You have came a long way girl.

Proud of you. -rh-

Jen, this is a success story for sure. This board is about coming out of it better and not bitter. And I know you have done that. Good luck and I hope you will still visit.

WOE

Jen:

OF COURSE it's appropriate 2 tell dv success stories here! It is one of the outcomes we all know we might face.

Yep, get the unlisted phone.

best,
-ol' 2long

Gee, it sounds like you're going to have your D finalized before mine. And for that, my dear Jen, I am a bit jealous. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

I concur with the unlisted telephone number. I plan on doing the same thing should I move again (I don't know for certain that the stbxH has my addy and phone #, but his family does... so that's enough for me. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> ).

Karen

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. It's good to hear from you all.

Topie, I sure do pray that the court process speeds up for you. You have waited more than long enough to get the legal finality on the demise of your marriage, and deserve to have closure too!

Oddly enough, this evening, a call from my H's cell phone came in. It rang once, then he hung up during the second ring. I wonder if he hit the wrong name on the speed dial or something. But thankfully that was the end of it, no calls back or any messages.

Also oddly enough, but thankfully, tonight I ran into my cousin, and the topic of where my H was came up, and so I came clean with her about the demise of my M, and so she'll tell my aunt and uncle and other cousins. I kept this one last pocket of my family in the dark about things, and it feels so good to get the truth out there. She was very supportive too.

Well, it is late and it's time for bed!

Jen

Jen,

You have grown in your maturity and inner strength. Your beauty shines through and I wish you well on your future endeavors.

I know you want to remove all the pain from your H but you know that you need to let him do so. He is a slow learner in this area. But he is learning.

In the meantime, you continue growing in your strength, knowledge and beauty.

Congrats on your new place. We should do a cyber housewarming party. NB is great about these cyber parties, maybe she will come and help us throw you one, eh? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Hugz,
L.

Thanks so much Orchid! Indeed a cyber housewarming party would be fun, but I do doubt that it would get NB to start posting again, it's been SO long since I've seen her around these parts!

Jen

Jen,

Yes, you ARE a success story and I hope you stick around to help those still struggling. Success is not ALWAYS that the marriage is saved.

Wishing you the very best and brightest future. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />