WH came around again today. He was off from work with a terrible case of strep throat (the very same infection he got when all this started. Hmmm), and came by this afternoon to see the kids.

Things went well - I'd prepared some homemade chicken soup (that he RAVED about! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ), and the kids were so happy to see him. I asked him if he got things ironed out for Easter, and he said that he planned to leave his mom's house around 3:30. So I said, "you're not staying for dinner?" and he said that he'd arrange with his mom to eat a little earlier than originally planned. I just absorbed that information for a moment when he piped in and said, "please don't give me sh*t about it - I'm just not up for it". I said that I was going to do no such thing. Perhaps SHE was giving him he** and he's sick of it, or maybe he just knows he's doing something 'wrong' by leaving in the middle of Easter. Who knows.

After dinner, we all went in the back yard for a nice game of tag - which left all of us with smiles on our faces. How can he participate in those kinds of family activities, and then turn around and go home to her???

When he was fixing to leave, I asked him if he wanted to take the rest of the chicken soup with him. He thought for a moment and just told me to keep it here for him when he comes on Thursday. Then said, "you guys tend to get real competitive with that kind of stuff". I asked him competitive how? The only things I know about her are straight from his mouth and the one time I met her. And that I wouldn't know HOW to compete with her. Then I said, "all I know is she has something I want". He was silent.

So was he just seeking the comforts of home while he's sick? I found it odd that he came over during the time that she should be arriving home from work. Hmmm. And what do you make of the competition remark? I'm confused.

- WHB

Who knows what is in their minds? I would just hang in there and keep taking care of and changing myself.

You will get through this and feel better soon.

I got the same remark the other day WHB.....And my husband is HOME now! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> I told him I didn't need to impress him...I am his wife! Maybe SHE needs to impress him, but I sure as heck dont need to!

At least your WH sticks around and plays with the kids...Mine never did any such thing. He was outa here as fast as he could be. Never even talked to them hardly.

I think you are doing a great job of the NO LB's...I'm still struggling wtih that one. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Thanks, Believer. I am doing my best to change myself for the better - I am so much more confident in my appearance. Whatever else happens, I am certainly much happier with my outward appearance. Actually, my inside appearance isn't too shabby, either! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Mom, if only my WH would take a cue from your FWH and come home. At least I know now that if he comes home again, it will be a much more sincere effort on his part - because now our son knows. He would HAVE to make more of an effort just because of that (when he left the first time, we told our son that WH had a new job in which he had to travel quite a bit).

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I told him I didn't need to impress him...I am his wife! Maybe SHE needs to impress him, but I sure as heck dont need to! </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You're in such a better place, self-confidence wise, than I am. I desperately want to impress him. That's me, by nature, though. I am a pleaser. And I've always had issues with myself. The OW has me beat in so many physical areas, it's hard to see past it. The fact that I'm thinner now than we married seems to have no bearing on the situation. Even though my WH never complained.... And the fact that he told me when he was home in December to get rid of the Vicky Secret catalog. Because OW had everything in it, and had the bod to match. He even told me that she took him into the store once. Ick. Tinman's right, we need a barf graemlin.

On the competiton remark... I think OW feels she is in competition with YOU. And he didn't want to take her guff by bringing home soup that you cooked. He just made the comment inclusive so he didn't seem like he was badmouthing his true love, but putting you both on an even keel so to speak.

But in his heart, he knows she is the only one who is competing. Let him chew on it awhile.

~ Snow

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I think you are doing a great job of the NO LB's...I'm still struggling wtih that one. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Believe me, there's a lot of tongue biting going on over here....... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

And we're all so lucky to have each other to vent to!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> He just made the comment inclusive so he didn't seem like he was badmouthing his true love, but putting you both on an even keel so to speak. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">HIS TRUE LOVE??????? GAG ME!!!!!!!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> But in his heart, he knows she is the only one who is competing. Let him chew on it awhile. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">And hey, she must know something I don't if she feels like she has to compete with me, right???

I totally agree with Snow. She is giving him **** over coming over to visit his son and his wife. AAAUUUGGGHHH!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> These O people make me want to scream.

Your husband does not like that...so never do it. You be the one who does not give him **** over her (as impossible as it seems) like she is giving him over you, and it will become more and more obvious to him as the days go by that OW is not all she is cracked up to be.

Ha...makes me laugh. The dream is shattering already!!!

Hang in there!

This is very counter "180-ish," but I wonder if you should start trying to do some really nice things for him, that will get back to her (the chicken soup thing was a great example). Check in with him to make sure he is feeling better. Pack a little Easter "basket" for him, with pictures from the kids, maybe some left-overs from easter dinner, his favorite cookies, etc). Ha, nothing makes me happier than driving the OW crazy, and she is sure to be LBing him left and right....depleting their "love bank"!!! Puke.. who can we talk to to get a Puke graemlin????
:-)

Christy -

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Your husband does not like that...so never do it. You be the one who does not give him **** over her (as impossible as it seems) like she is giving him over you, and it will become more and more obvious to him as the days go by that OW is not all she is cracked up to be.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I think I told mom23boys that I was doing a lot of tongue biting where LB'ing is concerned. I know what my WH likes and doesn't like - so I know to steer clear of giving him any concrete reasons why I think his skank needs to hit the road. He's the type of guy who needs to figure it out on his own - so just remind me of that in the future when I start to wield my 2x4. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

And I like your idea of the counter 180. Pics of the kids and stuff would be great - just have to make sure I'm in a couple of them! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> Hey! Since he's on the Atkins diet, I can make him an Atkins-friendly basket. Thanks for the great idea!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> I already sent him an e-card wishing him to get well. I'm not sure if she knows I still cook dinner for him, but I'm sure it has to get under her skin......

I love your devilish ways, Christy! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Hey, what part of FL are you in? We're in FL, too.

Tampa..how about you?

Tampa! Actually, Lithia - just south of Brandon. What a small world.