Ouch, you made me laugh out loud with the burning it and picture idea. Are you related to my W I swear that is something she would come up with. No disrespect but if you are setting around trying to figure out OW's response to what you do she is in control right now. Keep in mind, if there truly is NC then the only way she can have any control over you or your H is if you let her. Burn it, and forget it.

Mr. E-

I chuckled at the idea myself... But no was not a serious thought... actually there were SEVERAL thoughts that have come across our minds today... And truly I see what you are saying- that the more time we give to it the more "power" she seems to have over us.... But I think I decided at the beginning of the day when I started this post that I would give it ONE day's thought... Then make my decision... I don't want to make any sort of "snap" decision that I might regret.... And while burning it might be the way to go with my initial thought process.... I think for me- the returning it unopened will be the way I choose... And I think only because there was no "formal" NC letter sent.... This will be the NC letter- and we can see what happens from there... Hopefully it will stay "dead" as titlest so nicely put it... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Some of our other choices that never left the drawing room were:
1- Sending it to her XH- (He still doesnt know ANYTHING about the A, and thinks their D was for other reasons...)
2- Sending it to her new 22 year old BF... LOL...
3- Of course the burning it and then sending her the pictures of us burning it...

Of course these are all just thoughts that we could in some sick humorous way chuckle about... I am in no way mean or vindictive- so they are not my "style" so to speak.... Ultimately I have to live with whatever I chose.....
And I think I can live with that... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Thank you ALL for your posts, help, and kind words... I am going to go kiss my H and let him know EXACTLY what he did today means to me.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Please go to my post on general questions and pray for the PFC captured in Iraq.

You are so lucky that he gave it to you ..and UNOPENED!! WOW! Just curiosity would cause most UH to atleast open the letter. That was a BIG deposit in the love bank if you ask me <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

My vote is send it back, unopened and certified. Your H should enclose a note "I have already told you that I desire NO further contact with you. The only thing I care about is repairing my marriage and trying to make my wife happy again. Please respect my wishes and my marriage and do not try and contact me again, I will not read it"

I know for me, I would have read it within the first few minutes after it was put into my hands!

I would want and need to know just what she had to say. (Otherwise I would always wonder???)

Maybe it was a heartfelt apology with a promise to stay out of your lives.

Yes, for sure, I would NOT BE AFRAID to read it and I definitely would! I think that would be the MATURE thing to do.
Then I would decide what the next step would be....(Whether to respond or ignore.)
Sincerely, Julie

Well the votes are in... AND.. the winner is...

ME... ME... ME... ME.... Yeahhh... Yahhooo....

Sorry... Just had to make light of this situation... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I am going to the post office this morning... And mailing it certified, unopened, with the note...

Toomanylies-
Yep... the LB deposit was HUGE....And I truly feel GOOD about the direction our marriage is taking... Now to just be able to deal with this huge emotional basket of stress, feelings, emotions, etc... One day at a time... One step at a time....

Believer-
Done... Just said the prayer... And I will pass the word in my area....

Blessed Time-
Unfortunately I can guarantee it is not a heartfelt apology with a promise to stay out of our lives... I have seen the way it has been in the past- and as much as I would like to think it is.... I know its not <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />
Fortunately for me and H though- I think we really dont want to know what it says.... Dont want to open that door again and rehash those things.... (of course there I am sure there is a little part of both of us that is curious, but we can live with not knowing....)
I dont think I would be afraid to read it, but more "what's the point"... Does it truly matter what it says?... And I think the point would be better taken if it was returned.... At least in our situation....

Thanks again for the help...
I am off to the post office... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />