<strong>JSC: I do have letters from her attorney asking for money, etc, asking for custody of our daughter.

I don't have any offers for her to help pay any of the bills.</strong>

Orchid: Do you have an attorney?

<strong>JSC: I found out today that the A was still going on, and she went to Easter Worship services with the OM and our daughter.

Not only that, but her parents welcomed him to their Easter Party.

I am so full of anger right now, but I do not want to sin.</strong>

Orchid: Is your daughter safe around the OM? What do you know about him? What have her parents been told about the OM'R w/the WS? Do they know the truth? Is your daughter safe around your in-laws?

java,

It's hard for me to understand when families do this sort of thing. I guess they are afraid of losing their children, but it's so hard to take. What kind of relationship did you have with her family?

Yes I have an attorney, and I'm going to mention that I don't want to get these letter on Fridays anymore. They tend to ruin my weekend, LOL

I doubt there is any physical danger to my daughter. However, I certainly don't like the message being sent that it's ok to break your vows, that such promises mean nothing.

I'm just so angry right now...

Tony

JSC,

Your anger, pain and frustation is clearly seen. I am sorry for you having to suffer so.

Do you have a good MC or IC you can work with? Phone couseling with Steve or Jennifer here at MB may be an option. They are quite good about helping the BS stay on his feet. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

As for the damage to your child. Don't minimize anything. Bad example, words or actions can come at any time. All OMs are bad to have around our children. Remember the A is a selfish act on the part of the adult. The lesson it gives the children and what it exposes them to is an uncontrolled thing.

I would raise it as a concern to lawyer and MC or IC. Do a background check on the OM. Look for ways to keep your children from having to be around the OM.

A few WS have even had OMs in jail, doing drugs, ex-cons, etc. So you can see OMs can come in all shape and sizes. The thought that the OM would never hurt your child in any way is not a guarantee. Right now your W can't even guarantee she is a safe person for your children to be around. Why? Because she has already proven unfaithful, disloyal....and who knows what else.

I don't mean to scare you, just prepare you so you can avoid further hurt. Take this info in carefully but don't react uncontrolled. Plan wisely and safely for the protection of yourself and your family.

take care,
L.