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Ask in-laws for help?
#1128772 04/19/04 02:45 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 58
D
Dutchboy74
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Dutchboy74
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D Offline
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 58
Hi,

Is it a wise idea to ask my mother in-law for help? (FH = me, WS = my wife, EA). I have a very close bond with my in-laws, they accept me as if I were their son. We went on vacations etc together all over the world. I love to visit them, but hate to pretend our marriage is fine in front of them. So I suggested to my wife that we'd tell her mom, but she does not want to. She doesn't want her mom to get upset. Mom's sister was BW about 2 years ago. It really got mom upset, so my wife thinks it would kill her knowing that her own daughter had an affair.
Re: Ask in-laws for help?
#1128773 04/19/04 06:14 AM
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
No. Va.
W
worthatry Offline
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worthatry
Member
W Offline
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
No. Va.
Given what you stated in your other post about your W "giving up" the OM and even asking you to change her cell number, the answer to your question is "no."

Do not recruit your in-laws to help.

However, do not "cover" for your wife, either.

The default advice for the typical case of an ongoing affair is that in-laws should not be recruited, but questions from them asked in care should be answered honestly. This is with the goal in mind of helping the affair end.

If your wife is really giving up the affair, you have other important tasks since it's no longer an "ongoing" affair. Revealing it now to anyone else can only hamper your recovery.

For more on this see the embedded links in the link in my sig line below.

<small>[ April 19, 2004, 06:15 AM: Message edited by: worthatry ]</small>

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