Blessed Time,

I for one, appreciate your honesty. I imagine that this is a very confusing time for you, given the fact that you know what it was like to be a BS, and here you are tempted to do the same thing.

You are human, you are vulnerable, and I understand the need to feel alive and excited... having your emotions and senses awakened. I really do sympathise.

Try to take some time to think things thru... do you want your marriage or this OP. Be still, pray awile, consider what you may lose if you continue in your A. YOU have been thru alot from what I understand, why would you want to hurt any further as a consequence of your actions? Try to think "long-run" instead of instant(tempporary) gratification.

I do not pass judgement on you... I will pray that God's wisdom be imparted on you during this confusing time. May you be guided toward a decision that you and your family could live with.

Peace,

Odyssey

Blessed Time,

This is a joke right? You are another troll here. You must be because you state you had one EA on your H years ago, but were surprised and devastated by HIS A. You are now in another A, and you simply post here to tell all concerned how great it is.

So let's do the math. You have had 2 A's and your H one. I am beginning to understand why he had his A IF indeed this story is actually true.

Have a nice time Blessed Time, someone who will cheat and lie multiple times and come here to BRAG about it is not really going to be helped. I hope your H finds out soon so he doesn't waste any more time on this.

God Bless You, You will need it.

JL

Hi all.
Thank you to everyone for the replies; the understanding caring words and also the 2 X 4's!
This has been a really good experience writing as a WW.

All these months as a BW, I felt a feeling of pride and dignity.
I was on the high road.
I received and gave empathy to others.
I had NO SHAME for any of MY actions and got sympathy for my broken heart over my H's unfaithfulness.

I am pretty sure, although very very tempted, I will NOT commit adultery.

The OM and I have been great friends for 13 years and it was about 5 years ago that we felt loving feelings for one another.
FORTUNATELY, his work moved him to another state.
We have kept in touch through e-mail....but now he and the lady he lives with are back so that is why it is gonna be hard.

I know if I tell my H, that would probably put a stop to it...Maybe not!.. It won't stop the 'yearning' and the exciting thrill of running barefoot across the yard and hopping in the OM's car and grinning from ear to ear with blissful happiness!

No, I don't want to divorce my H and marry my friend. I guess I just want 'a little' of that feel good drug.

I am a 'young' 53...5'tall and weigh 137 lbs.
I am pretty. It feels good to be noticed and given love and affection from the OM.
I guess I feel like my H took me for granted for so long; perhaps he is still dreaming of the OW?

That is all for tonight.
Sincerely, Julie

BT:

"I am pretty sure, although very very tempted, I will NOT commit adultery."

Horse Puckey! You already have. You're in a PA now (kissing and feeling each other up is sex, whether you use all the plumbing fixtures or not). You've been involved in an EA with this toad for at least 5 years now, by your own admission.

But I don't believe these posts will help you at all. You're determined 2 continue on your downward spiral.

-ol' 2long

How disappointing.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<small>[ April 20, 2004, 06:14 PM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

" Blessed TIME "

Hmmm.......yah, sure. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> Go right ahead, your time will be anything but.......

It may be none of my business but this makes me furious.

Most WS's never really intended it, most don't plan it, most slip into it.

Doing it intentionally (like a WS who has spent time on MB and worked through one affair) is the difference between manslaughter and premeditated murder.

For manslaughter they generally punish a person and let them out, for premeditated murder they generally tie you to a chair and zap you.

It makes you feel good? Blech! What a sad excuse.

For goodness sakes stop right now. DO NOT put yourself through what i did to myself.

Need affection and adoration? Get a damned dog.
..or hey, here's an idea - maybe you could work on your marriage

(thoroughly and completely disgusted doorslam)

shudder.... I find this frightening and just hope it is a troll. Its scary there are people like this out there.

BT,

Has it crossed your mind that your ONGOING relationship with this man has drained your marriage. Has it occured to you that your H's A may have been in response to the fact that you have been focusing feelings, and time (via email) on this OM?

Has it crossed your mind that you have been the cause of a good bit of where your marriage is now?

If it hasn't NOW would be a really good time for you to use your mind and start to examine what YOU have done to your marriage. Your H's A was an obvious blow to it, but your ongoing relationship with this guy may have been the termites in the foundation of your marriage for a long time.

Use your mind, and your morals for awhile, and I think you might see things a bit clearer.

God Bless,

JL

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I am pretty. It feels good to be noticed and given love and affection from the OM.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yep, and you've become another example of "Christian" hypocrisy.

I still believe this is a hoax.

WAT

I look at an emotional affair much different than a sexual passionate affair.

The OM and I had not even so much as kissed back 5 years ago. We just knew we were infatuated/smitten with one another, so we were careful not to EVER be alone!
LOTS of eye contact, lots of phone conversations, our friendship grew and grew!

So these were my first kisses by another man since I have been married.

Just Learning, I don't think this EA had anything to do with my husband having a PA.
These feelings were put on a back back burner and I did not pine for him, I accepted he was gone...moved away!
And it is the same man, not a different man!

The e-mails between OM and me were not passionate love letters. They were sent to my regular account and my husband has the password!

The OM and I were careful not to cross the line.
WAT, our Christian ethics did keep us from going places where we could be alone and going too far!
It is just recently, with him moving back, that the temptation has been overwhelming!

I will do the right thing and tell him we have to keep our distance. And just let these two car rides be it! (I will think often of the kisses though. Of that I am sure!)

I DO NOT WANT to get caught up in a full-blown affair. I MUST stop taking this 'drug' now, right now!
Sincerely, Julie

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> Dustkitty? Is that you? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Blessed TIME:
<strong>The OM and I were careful not to cross the line.
WAT, our Christian ethics did keep us from going places where we could be alone and going too far!
It is just recently, with him moving back, that the temptation has been overwhelming! </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You DID cross the line and you ARE a hypocrit.

Where IS the line in your view???

So much for conversational Christian "ethics."

You are an example of why Christian "ethics" are a joke to so many.

Where would your ethics draw the line??? Hmmmmm???? When you drop your drawers? Or when you "submit"???? Or when YOU think it's "real"???? Or when you're "violated"???? Or when you "say" it's wrong????

Hmmmmm?

You give me support to eschew organized religion. Thanks for that.

WAT

Copied and pasted below WAT"S.

<small>[ April 20, 2004, 09:53 PM: Message edited by: Blessed TIME ]</small>

OK, I'm embarrased to be sucked into this obvious hoax.

No thinking, rational person versed in the characteristics of infidelity could possibly be lured into its clenches. Only a person steeped in self denial, abducted by aliens, could possibly be so deluded as to be SO captured.

An obvious hoax.

Ignore her.

WAT, I sent you an e-mail to the address you posted earlier.

I guess maybe to prove that I am real and not a troll as I am being accused of being from a few posters.
(I looked up 'Dustkitty' in 'search' and it was a person pretending to be someone they weren't.)

Sincerely, Julie
WAT, what you just wrote would be like a person knowing they should not take a drug or smoke yet they go ahead and do it! It happens!
We all have the potential of doing foolish things!

Blessed Time, why are you posting here if you're not a troll? Do you want our help? Do you want our validation? Do you want us to say it's okay? Do you want us to say, "Uh, sweetie, could you kindly put that gun down now?"

Yep, there are a lot of people who're going to think you're a troll. The story you tell is one we do not want to believe.

I'm going to assume that it's true, because the stories that are hardest on us are often the ones that ARE true.

So please.... tell me. Why aren't you going to tell your husband? You've said twice that that would end it.

If you choose to walk yourself and your husband and this other man and his partner through the dark tunnel of infidelity, that is your choice. But I want to know.

Why are you choosing to consider that walk?

My wife's emotional connection to OP far outweighed her sexual activities in terms of the amount of DAMAGE it did (and is doing) to me. Drop the lame justifications.

As for 'keeping your distance', how about 'fessing up to your husband and have him watch you write out and mail a no-contact letter. Hey, you might even be setting an example.

dewt

Soooo,

You're suprised that it's so exciting?
Is that it?
What did you think Satan would make stepping into sin feel like?
Of course it's fun - at first.

Sin will always take you farther than you thought you would stray.

Sin will always make you stay longer than you thought you would stay.

And sin will always make you pay more than you thought you would pay.

You really do know better so knock it off.
You have absolutely no excuse.

You have all the MB tools, so who emptied your toolbox?

You sound so very gleeful in your posts, it is quite sickening to read (sorry to offend).

Isn't it time that you grew up? You are what?53....you are sounding like a 17 year old bimbo.
Running through the grass barefoot to go for a ride with this bloke <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

He must be a real darling, I hope his new Lady friend finds out soon so that she gives him the heave ho and can get on with her life.

I wish you luck, you're gonna need it <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />