hi guys,<BR> Ah heck I don't know , it's just that I am trying to figure out how to believe a word Mike says to me about loving me, wanting to be with me wasn't going to leave me for ow, I just hadn't realized until today how bad the things he did and said hurt me, and that I am still not over that pain. If you didn't already see the "signs from above post, go look at it, I just can't write that all again. I just wish I knew how to forget those things happened, forgive him, yeah I can, forget it no, forgive him for being so very cruel to me, I am not sure, I hate to admit that, but it's true you know, the fact he had sex with the last ow is one thing, but the things he said and did still just kill me.<BR>Ok, I'm sorry for being down today, I have been trying to do good.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

Deb,<BR>I'm sorry you are so down today. I wish there was something I could do. I know how difficult it is to try to get past some of these things. The things these guys do and say, and how badly it hurts. I'm still trying to deal with these things too. <BR>I'm here if you want to talk about it... you can send me email if you want (I'll be gone during the day tomorrow, but I'll check in as soon as I get home).<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{DEB}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Thougts & Prayers<BR>B<P>------------------<BR>My favorite quote....<BR>"Hello, this is God. I will be handeling your problems today. I will not need your help, so sit back and have a good day."<BR>

Oh deb.. I'm sorry you're feeling down.<BR>I'll read the post but wanted to say something first ( had to change to our regular phone line and it takes so long to get into the posts ).<BR>ANyway, I know hat thus had been said so many times, and that een you know it, but I would really like for you to think about it again. Letting bad memories get us down does not help us. I know, not only I've been there, but still now, every once in a while I get them ( not as strong, but I get them anyways ).<BR>Even things that at the time didn's seem as serious as all the rest going on, sometimes creep up and yes I feel sad. After my birthday last week, I had a down period "kind of thing". This thoughts about the way he treated me while with her, the hurtfull things he said, the way he simplyfied everything even our kid's actions ( for awhile after he packed to leave, my little one, everytime I did something he didn't like , would go to his room, put a handfull of clothes on his little back pack and would anounce he was leaving, among other things ), all that would come up at odd times. However, you know me, I don't allow those thoughts to register in my brain for too long, counterproductive. I would just make an effort to think about someting good, or if I had trouble doing it, I would just pick a book and immerse myself untill the thoughts were forgotten again.<BR>But yes they do come up, even when things are at their best. Sometimes he's sleeping,holding to me, looking like a "little angel " ( yeah right !) and I should feel great... and I do... but sometimes, just sometimes the whole thing comes to mind. I don't think we will ever forget, although I believe they do - in a way - If you ask my H, he already has trouble describing her, and he sees her every once in a while at work. <BR>On the other hand, maybe it's actually positive that we don't completely forget. It helps us to rememeber what to do, so we don't have to go trought the same thing all over again.<BR>Don't let those tings get to you. There will be a time where you'll have to give them up and embrace a different choice. I know that your situation is quite different from mine, but in essence we're all in the same boat ( some a bit farther on the trip, some just at the begining ).<BR>Do take care<BR>Kat<P>P.S. e-mail me anytime and specially if you're feeling down. I check my e-mail at work, but only check the forum at home, so sometimes I came back to late and tired so I don't check it at all.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Each and everyone of us is deserving of a kind word, a gentle thought, and the gift of understanding.

hey guys,<BR> I guess it was just time for me to lance that boil, you know ? Let all of the nasty stuff drain out. All of that has been building up and hurting worse worse for a long time now. Yes, I need to let go, I am going to try to find a prayer on that in the am, and post it here. Meanwhile, I am going to go to my room and write a poision pen letter about this stuff, and maybe then I will burn it. Or maybe not, I'll pray about it, ok ?<BR>Thanks for letting me cry on your shoulders yet again. <BR>Hey Chris, feel better, ok , please ? Only one of us posters are allowed to come unglued at once. <P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

All right who's here ? For once I am in a decent mood tonight. I'm trying to stay up late, I have to see the shrink at 3 pm , and I hope I don't get lost again.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

Im here! After about 2 and 1/2 months away from this board, I decided to peek in. My life is still about the same....in limbo. I just left a reply post under "when is it time to give up". Oh well! I should call it a night now and go crawl into my empty bed. Good Night every one!

YEAH - I caught you in a decent mood!!!<P>Good, now you can take a turn at lecturing me!!! How does that sound?<P>Have you read my post on TNT's thread to me? Read it and tell me what an idiot I am to keep my mouth shut!!<P>Hugs and have missed you!!<P>Sheba<BR>

Pamela,<BR> Good night. I'm glad to see you came back.<P><BR>Sheba, ok I'll go look.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>