My H told me last week that he was working on Thursday, a usual day off, because he had changed his days of for this coming week and wanted to get an extra day in before the end of the month.( he works on straight commission). so, he went to work on Thursday, or at least daid thtat he did. I can not call him except by his cell phone, and most of the time I willg et his voice mail, which he replies to when he gets the chance. He did not tell me whaich days off he would have, however, and on the one day off that we had together, he went golfing with some friends from his work. I asked him how he could pay for such a day out, since it was one of the most expensive courses around here, and we are in big financial straights. He said that one of the guys was going to pay for his because he wanted my H to go and my H had told him that he couldn't afford it. It seems that several times my H has told me that his meals, drinks, etc. were paid for by someone at work. Hmmm. I have some very good friends at work too...but they do not feel obliged to pay for any entertainment for me!
Anyway, I brought up the days off thing again yesterday, and he told me that he did not know what his days off were....(but he had already told me last week that he changed his days off for the next week...). I told him to find out and call me that day at work. He called and left a message on my cell phone ( that way he doesnt have to talk to me directly) and informed me that he had been trying to work out a schedule for next week, but then the VP of the company told them they were getting a new manager in that dept. and so would have the same days off they had been taking for a while!!!! I believe this sounds like nothing but BS. The excuse is flimsy, plus, he ahd alrady said he cahnged his days off. I wonder if he even went to work that Thursday last week...
Then today, I found a silver, engraved charm type thing, maybe it goes on a key ring????, anyway it had his initials on it, the back said, " With Love, Rikki" This is the 21 yr old that hs told me he referred to has daughter, and did not find her physically attractive. He said that he just never thought of her " in that way...I guess she is just not my type. She is real little, and mscular, she works out all of the time" I thought, well then, since I look nothing like THAT,and I thought I was your type....what is the deal???? And, this is not the girld that I thought he was still involved witd. In fact, hte call to her on his cell had not shown up much at all. Except there was one to her the very night he returned from a business trip, but I did not notive any others to her. Mostly to the 25 yr old who is married. Rikki is not.
Help......I can not stand this grief scene much longer. I think that if he would just admit there has been at the very least an EA, then I could feel there was the chance to work it all out. But what do I do, when I know there has to be something...he still spends little time with me, and never calls me through the day, even tho I have asked him to do that for me. He says that is just his stubborn side. I suggested a separation. since living with him is so hard for me right now emotionally ( always wondering what he is doing , because he comes an goes at will. and feeling hurt because of the lack of affection)
This has been going on since last summer...I have tried to get him to a MC not gone yet. I have tried to be patient, but after so long that runs out. He said that he "didnt realize there was a time limit for these things" Well.....what am I supposed to do let him sit the fence forever???
UGHHHH! I hate this!!!!!! HE has even lied to our 16 yr old about cashing her paycheck and using the money for himself...another long story.
ME: 46
H 47
D 16, from his prev marriage
D 6, ours
