For those of you who don't know where I am at, my husband moved out two weeks ago and is going to file for divorce (so he says). He has seen a lawyer but has not hired him or filed any paperwork. I am trying to do my best plan A and not push him with relationship talk (he says I pushed him to much when he was living at home). Dd was March 15th and he does not know if he can fall in love with me again. He may still be talking with OW. I have no proof of the situation either way.

My question is he is leaving on Wednesday for a vacation to visit his family. I would love to give him a card saying I love him and hope he has a good trip. Would this be too much pushing?? I want him to know that I still don't want this divorce and want to reconcile but I don't want to push him to fast. Many people have said don't say I love you or give him any relationship talk. Any suggestions on what I might do before he leaves just to show him I am still here and loving him??? Or should I do nothing and stay quiet till he comes back.

H&F,

I would be quiet and not send any cards or say any mushy stuff right now.He obviously felt pressured before so if anyhting,you could casually mention something about his trip when he returns.Maybe his family will have some influence on him and when he does come back,you can be open to discussion with him.

Anyway,from what I have read in the past about cards,gifts and other gestures,it doesn't always ensure the intended outcome from the WS that we would hope.Let it slide for now IMO.Maybe review the 180 list if your WH is really thinking of a D.

O