I've been having dreams lately... about 2-3 times a week I dream about her.

Some nights I dream that we are back together and wake up and she's not there and I'm crushed.

Tonight I had a dream that her boss offered her a raise and she decided to stay in smalltownsville, Ont, and not come back to us. This was followed by the mother of all fights where she threatened to claw my eyes out and I LB so HUGE, all in front of our son and guests. And there was an OM too...

Now it's 4:30 am and I can't shake the feeling of the dream...

If I could only call her and hear her voice...

But that wouldn't really help much these days...

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

dewt

Am sorry Dewt that you are having haunting dreams.

I suppose its the bodys method of trying to work things out.
In the past I'm sure it was your WW that you could talk to if you had a bad dream, such as I with my WH.
Try diverting yourself . . . as you must be doing already cause you wrote this post. Get on the computer or turning the television on.

Granted diverting yourself doesn't make the "stuff" go away . . .but you can busy your mind in another direction temporarily to not think of the dream.

I have been doing the daydreaming bit of late. Fantasizing that WH will be home when I get home from work . . . and I play out a happy scenerio.
Or I'm in the store and he has purposefully hunted me down (something he used to do when he was so madly in love with me).
I was always amazed of how he could find me when he wanted to see me so badly. Not so now.

I know exactly what you mean about hearing the spouses voice and it being a calming effect. And yet sadly we know differently too.

Diversion is the best way to get away from this torture. Its temporary . . . it's ALL temporary.

Dewt:

I understand completely about the dreams. I wake up nearly every night with my heart racing from some dream. Typically I think of some guy my W was friends with and dream about how she MUST have had an A with him also. I will often wake my W up to ask her more hard questions in the middle of the night. I will be very, very happy when the dreams start to go away.

Todd

Dewt,

I can't imagine your pain.

I can't offer any words except I'll pray for your marriage to heal.

I will pray that God will open her eyes.

God bless you,

jg

Dewt

I have these dreams as well. It usually consists of my H leaving me and the details of the A that he won't disclose.

I've even screamed myself awake. Of course when I wake up my H is right there beside me to tell me everything is OK but I still feel sick to my stomach for a few days following.

I've convinced myself in my dreams that recovery isn't possible and that what I'm living in my daily life is the dream.

I hate this!

I also thought these dreams were being caused by the melatonin I was taking to help me sleep. I've since stopped taking this and started a new routine to help me sleep at night. I know it's bad but on the nights that I can't sleep I take nyquil. It knocks me out and I don't feel hungover in the morning. I do not advocate this practice but it's the only thing that helped me. I also do not have dreams when I take the nyquil but I can't predict the dreams so there's no way to avoid them all together.

Sending you my prayers.

Thanks for your replies, and particularily your prayers. I'll be sending some right back your way. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I guess there's no way to avoid them. The worst thing about it is that I can't win. Sometimes I dream that we are back together and when I wake up and realize that she's not here, I'm struck by an almost unbearable loneliness. The dreams (like last night) where we are still apart are usually characterized by extreme nastiness and I wake up and can't shake the feeling that terrible woe is about to befall me.

Last night sucked. It was a while before I got back to sleep. Reading my Bible helped. It gave me something else to think about when I finally closed my eyes.

dewt