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<small>[ September 14, 2004, 03:19 PM: Message edited by: Tenn25 ]</small>

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<small>[ September 14, 2004, 03:22 PM: Message edited by: Tenn25 ]</small>

Tried to post before, but boy does this bring up memories. There was YEARS of denial that i received. He made it sound as though I was the crazy one...there was nothing wrong...it was my imagination...I was too sensitive...

Then I found out it was even WAY worse than I thought.

Trust your instincts, you are NOT crazy. And become prepared. What he is doing may be vile and maybe illegal. Get your ducks in a row. Install a keylogger? Talk to people he works with? I told H that whether he told me something was going on or not, I would assume there was unless he could prove to me there wasn't anything going on...

You are beautiful, and this is not happening because of you. This is HIS problem.

I know, you just want to know WHAT is going on. You can expend your energy trying to find out, or protecting yourself (or a little of both, but I would concentrate on protecting yourself). He may be in something deep (with overseas trips and all) and it may come crashing down for him...

You can talk with him, but he may not own up to anything unless he is afraid of losing something (job, marriage, kids, etc...), denial seems to be his M.O. I don't want to sound hopeless, there is hope, but it has to come from H. You can cut out LB's and meet his EN's and expose his behavior to ...who? Coworkers? Family? But be prepared for Plan B...

It may just be me, but this behavior seems pretty oogy (is that a word?) and creepy.

We are in that part of the world - and I'd be very suspicious if I were you. My H's A was discovered because I found photo's of him and OW (asian, half his age) in the sent messages - he forgot to delete them. He'd downloaded about 20 pictures of her and had a devil of a time deleting them because of something called thumbnails that he couldn't get rid of, but eventually did. Stupid guy should have known I never go to the hard disk to find pictures. Anyway, there is that little box across the top of your computer with the address of your current site - if you scroll down, will show you the sites that he's been at the last couple of weeks and then there's something like control 7 that gives you a thorough history of where he's been the last few days.

Now if he's using Windows XP (bear in mind I know nothing about computers), my H's best friend got caught because after the photo site has been last visited, there is a message comes up (a little one inthe corner) that give you an option to go back there. Wife found his pictures with OW from that method.

Your H sounds like one of the VERY careful ones though. He's covering his tracks really well. Next time he goes to China, wait till the day he's going and then hide the camera - make him think he's lost it. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> See if he buys another camera??

You are going to have to talk to some experts on how to track his activities. I will ask my FWH for more insights - though my H sounds an amature compared to yours. Can't you go to China on the trips? A lot of women in China a poor and there is 1.3 billion people there to compete with. There isn't much some of them won't do.

The site where they send pictures doesn't pay does it? I thought the photo's were voluntary. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

I think you are shrewd and you will find out what is going on, if you play this right. But are you ready for the disappointment if you are right?

make that control H. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />