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#1144160 06/07/04 11:59 AM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 444
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My WS was honest with me at lunch and told me the OM called and they talked for 15 minutes. We were interrupted and did not get to finish our conversation so I don't know all the details. I had planned to phone the OM's wife today and recommend to her SAA and His Needs/Her Needs. I am torn as to tell her about the contact but at the same time this ripped my guts out and I think someone needs to be honest with her (OM's wife).
I did not LB. I calmy told my WS that I knew from my readings (SAA) that there was a huge emotional attachment and I was willing to listen and help her. Any feedback would be appreciated.

#1144161 06/08/04 12:56 AM
Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 8,016
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We were interrupted and did not get to finish our conversation
Did you get back to the conversation ASAP? That should be a pretty important thing on your table.

I had planned to phone the OM's wife today and recommend to her SAA and His Needs/Her Needs. I am torn as to tell her about the contact but at the same time this ripped my guts out and I think someone needs to be honest with her (OM's wife).
Absolutely.

I did not LB. I calmy told my WS that I knew from my readings (SAA) that there was a huge emotional attachment and I was willing to listen and help her.
This is great. Try not to push this stuff down her throat. Simply tell her (when the subject is brought up) that it is helping you to understand it all.

#1144162 06/07/04 02:42 PM
Joined: Aug 2000
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Hello,

Your WS must have No Contact period. Did she send him a No Contact Letter. Talking to the OM for 15 minutes is counterproductive and harmful to your recovery. It goes against the priniciples of marriagebuilders. If the roles were reversed, would your wife be accepting of this?


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