Well hi everyone. I am feeling much better today. I went to lunch and ran into a guy I used to work with. Let's just say he was never very good at the MB program, and has just gotten divorced.

He proceeded to tell me that he just got back from the Philippines, where he went to meet his future wife. He met her on-line at a site called americansingles. He has been e-mailing her for about 5 months.

He went and met her and her family. She is very young and pretty, and her name is (get this) Lolita. Her dad goes to the market everyday and buys fruit to sell on a hand cart that he pushes around. She has a college degree and makes $120. a month.

This guy is the fourth man I've known that married someone that they didn't even know. What is up with that??????? What do you all think?

Would you ever want to marry someone who is so desperate to get out of their situation?

Believer, my sister knew her boyfriend from internet. He had D 3 times, my sis never married. I pray that it is Mr. Right for her.

I had a high school friend who D few years ago in China, then married a Canadian man who is 70 years old. As soon as she came over Canada, she filed for D, and found someone from internet in MI. She was supposed to marry in April, but couldn't get a visa to cross the border. She claimed that she is a christian. I feel ashame for her.

I really don't feel good about doing something like this. That is why we all stick to MB.

lostnhurt - Well I've just really been thinking about this all day. The guy I used to work with is no prize. But he does make good money.

The other guys I know that did this had different results. One had the girl leave him, as soon as she got her citizenship. The other one is still married, but not too happily. The other two are extremely happy, and married with children.

I just wonder what drives these guys to take such a chance. And what does that say about their self-esteem. They are marrying someone that they don't know, who is desperate.

It reminds me something. It was how OW knew her H. It was 12 years ago,we took this guy back to China. He interviewed about half a dozen, and found her. About 6 months later, she came over and got married. Now she got my WH.

Another guy did similar thing. The W left when she landed in the first US airport. Then he went back to China again and found someone else. Now they are happy with 3 children.

Yikes! I think if I end up divorced, I might try this approach. Seems like there is just as good a chance, as there is of meeting someone here.

yummmy

harudah - You are so bad!!!! If my marriage does not work out, I think I will put in an order for a young sweetie, that is smart, from who knows what country. I am really flexible.

I'll send you mine.... as long as you massages his feet, feed him well, and make sure you can keep up for a very long time...He's not too demanding!

Seriously, its not a bad idea.... who said marriage had to be based on 'stupid' emotions that makes all of us WEAK.. WEAKLINGS I SAY!

<small>[ June 09, 2004, 08:58 PM: Message edited by: Harudah ]</small>

sorry...didn't mean to upset anyone...

ARK

<small>[ June 09, 2004, 10:01 PM: Message edited by: ark^^ ]</small>

I knew few Indian couples. They never met each other before the wedding, it was family arranged. They are happy.

My WH's grandfather were born in US. He went back to China to marry her grandma. He went back 3 times in in life time, each time long enough to have his wife pregnant. He only saw his kids when they grew up. Wh's mother was thought a son and reported as a son when he returned to US. Many years later, MIL wanted to reclaim her citizenship but failed. Becaused her father reported her as a son, not a D.

Grandma died in China, and grandpa died in US. They only had less than 3 years together in their life time. It is a sad story.

:::::!! If my marriage does not work out, I think I will put in an order for a young sweetie, that is smart, from who knows what country. I am really flexible.

I can give you the name of one!!! Please, please write to her and get rid of her from next door to me!!!!!!!!!!!

We live in Asia and there are 230,000 maids from the Philipines here. This is why I'm on this site. A VERY pretty 26 yo with VERY big breasts, wrote a seductive letter to my balding, gray headed H who looks 60 but was 50 at the time. "would you like to know me better?" was her question to him. As he is old and plain, he could not resist a pretty young body. Here the Philipino maids are referred to as LBFM's. Little Brown &^%$#& Machines. Anyone with a social conscience need not apply.

My H got the idea of trying one out, while I was away so much when my mother was dying of breast cancer. We had been happily married for 30 yrs. His best friend here had told him that he'd HAD one and she had LOVED IT. His best friend forgot to tell him that he'd contracted genital wards from the LBFM and given them to his wife. They both had to have extensive treatmet at the STD clinic. Good huh?

So, if you want to look like a right d*ck head - get yourself one. I'll give you the name of the little b *&^% that messed up our lives if you like? She's really into that kind of thing and desperate to get a rich guy.

oh.. you know..

last night I was just kidding, but you know, there are people that never meet each other and have arranged marriages and it works out. See people change even if you know them for a long time, when the change comes up, you do not notice and you think you do not know this person anymore.. so what's the point in getting to know each other? Anyways dating sucks! People lie most of the time ... until you start living with them, an dknow about the obsessive compulsive disorders....like me.. ... I clean everything around my house too much and take 4 showers a day.. but it doesn't get in the way of my productivity... if I can't take a shower, I won't do it at work.! Anyways, I don't eat at fast restaurant because I don't think they wash their hands.... and I need to be served with gloves on..

Ok enough about, but my point is.. that dating is all crap because you can date someone for 10 years until you live with them for more than 9 months you won't know.. and even after that they can change you see a totally different person of what you wree living with or dating..

SO I don't care if someone know the person for more 8months or 2 months because it really doesn't matter. The formula to marriage isn't written in stone! What happens afterwards.. is what the promises are, and the willingness to make your marriage work. Let's you meet someone and that same day you just got attached.. and you said "from this moment, I will love you, cherish you, hold you in my arms when you're sad, respect you,a nd I want the same thing." And the other person says.. "I want this.. and this and this..." and you both agree..then go get married if you respect all the emotional needs and the love and respect part... because that's the way love goes.. we love people that loves us and show us love.

I beleive if my husband was treating me like **** all the time, I wouldn't still be here. The decision wouldn't be so hard to make. So I think we're all mature adults..and if we take a step back from crying.....whining...and going all emotional and feeling betrayed, we might be able to move on from our pain.

I personally know its not just the fact that I got cheated on that makes me sad.. its everything that's going in my life that makes me want to have anxiety pills. I am on the road to recovery,... I was hurt, still is because my H broke a promise, and all I've ever asked was for him to be honest with me. And not go behind and do ****. I wish he would have said "look, I found this girl, and I like her a lot and I want to go out with her." HA! Then I know for sure the minute the words would come out of his mouth he would change his mind cuz this girl isn't me~!

so.... all of you that want order=brides.. good luck, but becareful, most of these girls want a situation, and not going to meet all your emotional needs, because they might not feel the same about you. Now if you meet someone online and you've been talking, met and wants to kick it.. I say A-okay.

anyname - Sorry about this thread. I didn't think before I started it. I am a female BS. It was very insensitive for me to joke about this situation. It is really quite sad. Please forgive me.

Hi believer.

I don't think there is anything wrong with meeting someone on the net as long as you get to know the person a little bit before meeting them in person. a few phone calls and a few repeated questions can tell you a lot about a person. And of course one visit will answer many question about that person.

you probably do realized this, but so many people here in the USA are spoiled rotten when it comes to finding mate. So many women want a wealthy guy, a fancy car, and a big extravagant home. I know many of them. Also, many men are looking for a super foxy lady who will agree with them on everything and serve them like a king. I can tell you from first hand experience there are many many people outside of the USA who do not think this way because there are very few people around them who live this way. In my own opinion, going to another country to find a mate may be one of the best things a person ever does. My father did it when he was stationed in Germany. My mother is one of the hardest working ladies i've ever known. She can cook some unbelievable meals and keeps a home that's extremely clean. She also raised me in a very strict manner. You don't find a lot of American ladies like this. How about the men and wormen of Mexico? You talking about some hard workers! Plus many of them have strong family values. Sometimes family values are difficult to find in the USA.

So, the internet has opened doors to finding mates that were once unable to be opened. If you want to speak to a single man in France, then you can probably do it in less than an hour. If a man is looking for a 30 year old lady who has never been married, has no children, has a good education, good family values, believes in God, and is not spoiled rotten, then he only has to go South of our US border. There are a ton of single Mexican girls looking for a good man to treat them right.

We Americans have it very easy here in the USA compared to most other countries. You can find this out for yourself by visiting some international chat rooms. Many forieners speak English and will tell you what I am telling you.

Now, the kicker is to use good judgement when meeting someone for the first time. There are ways to find out the truth by just asking a few simple questions and then finding out if they are true or not. Visitors visas are granted to many people each day to come to this country for a visit. This is a good way to get to know a foriegn person.

In a way, mail order marrriages are closer to the original institution of marriage. People did not used to choose their own spouse - this concept wouldn't even exist until the late middle ages. You married whomever your family selected for you, you stayed married for life and that was that. Of course, that may be why adultery started in the first place, too.

Another first: sex with a stranger.

believer, Thank you for your sensitive response. I was so distressed when I read the post, I just blurted out my feelings. This girl has ruined our lives. My H had always been devoted to me and everyone thought him the nicest guy you could ever meet. He was never sleazy or flirty with women - just really solid and dependable.

Over in this part of the world, we are constantly hearing of how western men are taken down by the Filipino girls. Some of them are more cunning than sewer rats. Regularly western men are murdered by them. One of our married male friends was drugged by two Filipino girls in a cinema - his wallet and passport were gone when he woke up. (fun explaining that to his wife!) Some of them are delightful, decent, honest human beings, but many of them are calculating, unethical, heartless little sluts. They have no consciences's. Why would they?

Their homes have dirt floors and they are poorer than you or I could imagine. So because they are young and pretty, they use the only assets they have and usually they end up with ugly old men, because such men are not particular as long as they can get sex from "lovely young bodies". I feel real sorry for some of these girls, having to be pawed by old men, with druel running down their chins.

It's almost impossible for me to believe that the wonderful man I married 32 yrs ago, became one of those men, until I discovered pictures of him with one, on our home computer. My heart was broken into a million pieces. He is a shattered man today. He was a victim and she targetted him. He was bowled over by the flattery. Even when she asked him for a large sum of money, he couldn't think about what she was doing with him. Fancy being flattered by someone who is only with you to extract money from you - a cold, heartless con artist.

I think men are so soft in the head that getting a bride from Asia et al, is very risky. Asians have lived in poverty for a very long time. This has caused them to be far more underhand and calculating than western men. They should proceed with great caution - but they don't. <sigh>

anyname -

I am so glad that you read my last post. I was completely insensitve. My friend that is marrying the Philippino girl told me to imagine going to Tijuana, but in the Phillipines it is 100 times worse.

I beg your forgiveness. I was looking at this problem like a joke. But now I realize that this is real life for some people. It makes me extremely sad that these things are happening.

So please forgive me for this post. I know now that it was a huge mistake.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Hi believer.

I don't think there is anything wrong with meeting someone on the net as long as you get to know the person a little bit before meeting them in person. a few phone calls and a few repeated questions can tell you a lot about a person. And of course one visit will answer many question about that person.

you probably do realized this, but so many people here in the USA are spoiled rotten when it comes to finding mate. So many women want a wealthy guy, a fancy car, and a big extravagant home. I know many of them. Also, many men are looking for a super foxy lady who will agree with them on everything and serve them like a king. I can tell you from first hand experience there are many many people outside of the USA who do not think this way because there are very few people around them who live this way. In my own opinion, going to another country to find a mate may be one of the best things a person ever does. My father did it when he was stationed in Germany. My mother is one of the hardest working ladies i've ever known. She can cook some unbelievable meals and keeps a home that's extremely clean. She also raised me in a very strict manner. You don't find a lot of American ladies like this. How about the men and wormen of Mexico? You talking about some hard workers! Plus many of them have strong family values. Sometimes family values are difficult to find in the USA.

So, the internet has opened doors to finding mates that were once unable to be opened. If you want to speak to a single man in France, then you can probably do it in less than an hour. If a man is looking for a 30 year old lady who has never been married, has no children, has a good education, good family values, believes in God, and is not spoiled rotten, then he only has to go South of our US border. There are a ton of single Mexican girls looking for a good man to treat them right.

We Americans have it very easy here in the USA compared to most other countries. You can find this out for yourself by visiting some international chat rooms. Many forieners speak English and will tell you what I am telling you.

Now, the kicker is to use good judgement when meeting someone for the first time. There are ways to find out the truth by just asking a few simple questions and then finding out if they are true or not. Visitors visas are granted to many people each day to come to this country for a visit. This is a good way to get to know a foriegn person. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You’re so right it is so disgusting how AMERICAN women are all lazy, selfish, and generally not deserving of anything….

And how wonderful and noble it is that American men will go and purchase an impoverished wife so that she will SERVE him as he deserves. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

believer,

It comes to my mind to try Eastern Euro Bride ... just a tought <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" /> , never happen.

-rh-

::::And how wonderful and noble it is that American men will go and purchase an impoverished wife so that she will SERVE him as he deserves.

Just Wondering, Believer, is a BS. She obviously feels terrible for raising this subject. She does not support this kind of trading in human flesh. It's the sad looser men in our society that bring this trade about. A former friend of ours from many years ago, went to the Philipines and acquired a wife, some 25 yrs his junior, and he openly stated that he wanted a wife with a tight ar*se. Now there's a statement you can be proud of. I thought how well it would go with his anally retentive mind!

Nothing is ever THAT simple though. Our friend's wife had an affair with a man at their church and she left him for the OM. They'd been married for 20+ years. I felt so bad for him. I guess I understood that he didn't really mind if he got one without a heart next time. At least that way, he wouldn't have any shocks, down the track.

Believer - don't worry about this post. At least it has given the readers who thought it was a good idea, something to think about.