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#1145410 06/12/04 11:11 AM
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Anyname,
Have you created a plan for your suicidal thoughts?

cwmac

#1145411 06/12/04 11:13 AM
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BTW, I'm taking 450mg of Wellbutrin cause Cwmac = really nuts.

cwmac

#1145412 06/12/04 01:48 PM
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Wellbutrin does have a jittery side effect initially. My H had a very hard time going to sleep and would wake up, with sweats. It was an up and down period for him. He was very emotionally labile for a couple weeks. Eventually along with our MCing, things smoothed out. Think that the sexual desire comes back when you are feeling good.

Anyname, you need to quit the caffeine at this time if you are jittery, or limit it to a cup of coffee per day, and be aware of colas, chocolate with the caffiene. Eating food that is wholesome, less the processed junk we love - but it hates us! Whole wheat, brown rice, fruit vegies, meat, ...cut down on sugar foods.

Counseling is needed along with depression. Suicidal thoughts that are happening are a problem which needs some concerned attention. In order to work through these extremely sad/angry feelings, we need to talk to a professional. Talking is helpful. A doctor who is understanding and can give the medications is good(psychiatrist, the psychologist is not able to prescribe meds).

My H happened to have a very good medical doctor. She spoke to him about "emotional intelligence" which is a great phrase. And when we have EI, then we can learn better methods of coping. But that medication helped him, as she told him to stay on it, and he was able to quit smoking and drinking as well.

I am glad that we got through that time...was very tough, but we did it. And if we did it, I know others can too.

#1145413 06/12/04 06:01 PM
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Just want to update everyone on my experience...
I have been on the prescription for three days now. I am up at night for long periods of time and do awaken frequently when I finally fall asleep.
I have an odd "disconnected" feeling and have had horrible dreams. I did have something major happen in my ongoing journey today and seemed to be very level in regards to it all...
I think that once these initial feelings pass, I will be OK. I felt like a zombie on Paxil.
I have a follow up appt. in a week, so I'll update again then.

#1145414 06/12/04 07:21 PM
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anyname, I just read your last post. I am VERY concerned about you. I'm glad you have been honest here about your suicidal thoughts and the fact you have a plan.

First of all, I found out about my H's A about 3 weeks before my 49th b-day. Of course I knew something was up and was planning on leaving him because I was so miserable. This whole A experience sucks no matter what stage of life we are in. My supervisor who has many years in the mental health field said something this traumatic can throw a woman into menopause. If that's true, I'm lucky it didn't happen to me. Do you have a good doctor that you can check out your hormone levels with, and other possible physical causes for your depression?

Now back to the suicidal thoughts and your plan. You need to get help! Don't think for one minute you will be doing your children any favors by committing suicide. When a person is in the dark tunnel of depression those thoughts seem reasonable, but they're not. You're children would suffer for the rest of their lives. They need you in their lives.

Now the good news is depression is very treatable. YOU HAVE TO PUT YOURSELF AS NUMBER ONE NOW! I'm yelling at you now, OK? If your H doesn't know what you wrote on here, please show him. If he can't adequately support you, then contact someone close to you who can. That is the 1st step. You need support now. Then you need to get help, as I said, PRONTO! If I were to see a client in your shoes I would consider hospitalization if the person wasn't willing to get the help they need. The top priority is for you to be safe.

I am not a psychiatrist and so don't prescribe drugs. I am not sure that at this point the Wellbutrin is your best option because of your anxiety and on and off eating disorder. This is something that needs to be openly discussed with a doctor. I know SF is very important to you, however feeling more in control of your life and emotions will help you and your R with your H. I am very glad I started out with the Lexapro right after d-day. It helped me cope, and really cut the anxiety, which is what I needed. Is there any professional help where you are in Asia? If not, would it be an option for you to go back to the country you are from and get the help you need?

These As knock us off our feet. My dad was dying and died while H was in his A. I know I didn't deal with the grief over my dad's death because I was so overwhelmed with the trouble in my M. I know the one year anneversary in August will be tough. You had to deal with similar issues and others it appears also. And having the OW right there in your face, I can't even imagine what you're going through.

Listen, no matter what happens with you and your H you have to believe you will survive this. PLEASE, talk to your H and get the help you need. When you are out of this dark hole of depression you will see everything in a clearer light. I promise you that!

Please don't hesitate to ask me any question. I felt compelled to write to you. You will be fine, but you need to get the help you need. I'm sending prayers your way! CV

#1145415 06/12/04 08:24 PM
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Thank you everyone for your respones's. I feel a bit better because I'm not premenstral at present. My H knows how bad I get and he's trying to do/be everything possible to help. He's not experienced with this type of behavior (who is?) but is very sympathetic. On the bad days last week, he popped home from work during the day to check on me/visit with me. I have no friends here and spend my days on my own. Which is not healthy for someone like me.

I don't have much time now but think Lisa is right about trying Wellbutrin. (I just can't face sexual dysfuction on the other types of SSRI's). The drug I can get here (Zayban?) is comes in 150mg tablet which I'll split into quarters and take one 35mg per day initially. I don't want to arouse unnecessary anxiety.

Suicide thoughts are not with me at the moment. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> AGain, thanx everyone. Cwmac, you sound like you have improved quite a lot on Wellutrin yeah?

an

#1145416 06/12/04 08:44 PM
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Oh yeah. It flattens out all my emotions. The peaks and valleys are flatter. That's good for the valleys but it's no fun that for the peaks. I'm not depressed nor am I really happy.

You need to take meds under the watchful eye of a doctor because some depressants when started will actually initially increase the suicide tendency. This is short term if it even happens to you at all.

As someone said above you need to be concerned when you start thinking of a suicide plan.

take care,

cwmac

#1145417 06/12/04 10:28 PM
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cw and anyname...it makes my heart happy <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> to see you two corresponding now! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

#1145418 06/13/04 10:38 PM
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.it makes my heart happy to see you two corresponding now!

cw, has a kind heart. Any emotional response to posts can be totally understood in the light of the emotional state we are all on. More than ever I understand his reaction to my previous post. I think we would all have much longer fuses, if we were'nt feeling like our worlds have collapsed around our ears.

Btw, I don't think it's the plan that's the danger, it's the feeling like suicide is a comfortable friend. I think there's an altered state of mind that comes with suicide, probably much the same as the altered state of mind that comes with an A. I think it depends on how big a grip the altered state of mind gets. There is also probably a defining point where you give yourself permission to proceed.

#1145419 06/14/04 12:21 AM
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Anyname,
Your attitude towards suicide as well as thinking of the plan of how to do it are both warning signs.

To go on my meds my IC sent me to psych that perscribes meds for her patients.

He asked if I had thought of suicide. I said yes. He asked what I thought about it. He also asked if I had thought of a plan.

He also said it was very important for doctors to watch patients closely when they first go on meds. The meds can cause a suicide reaction in the very beginning.

cwmac

#1145420 06/14/04 04:42 AM
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Meds are something I deal with every day. As a health professional dealing with patients who are many times depressed after being handed a serious diagnosis/prognosis, we have great results with Lexapro. And no, it's not over the counter. Fast working and they tolerate it well. It is a kinder and gentler Celexa basically.

Little side effects. And yes, when I was going thru the horrors of my D and the legal battles of last year (three court appearances and almost a final fourth and numerous hearings without me there)I was given some by MD I worked with. Worked like a charm. I was strangely unable to cry but considering it was a feeling so different from the hell I was in, it was awesome. And I would be so happy that sometimes I'd work thru lunch and forget to eat. But I remember that when I did eat, food tasted pretty darn good.

I am a fan of it and ended it after taking it for three months and did so carefully and not cold turkey. The real idea of an AD is that someone isn't on it indefinitely and use it to help them thru a crisis so they may maintain clearer perspective. Inability of AD's to work over longer periods of time might need that the person needs to be re-evaluated again as the diagnosis might be off track.

had patient last week who was completely depressed and almost wishing "he could just go to sleep and not ever wake up again" after finding out he had CHF (congestive heart failure) and needed some serious interventions. He was placed on lexapro and doing awesome. He is even more compliant and is so the good patient and his wife can't believe the positive difference in his life. The AD is helping him want to take an active role in helping his heart problem and in making him pro active in other areas of his life.

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