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UPDATE
My wife and I discovered yesterday that he (OM) has screwed my son over on several other occassions. My son and his son play on the same baseball team and the OM has screwed my son over regarding baseball twice. I just want to rip him a new one over that and the fact that he is willing to screw him over regarding vacation. It is obvious that he doesn't love my son like his own.
My wife and I both see the total picture now. My former best friend is not who we thought he was. We are not going to have anything to do with him and his wife from this point forward. I know this will help me more than anything in bringing closure or peace of mind, whatever you want to call it. However, I did not want it to be at the expense of my son.
I will, also, be returning his sweatshirt at tonights baseball game. My wife doesn't really know why she wanted to hang onto it in the first place.
My wife and I are getting along great. Other than this one huge mistake she is the perfect wife and mother. I love her dearly! <small>[ June 22, 2004, 06:21 AM: Message edited by: Hustle ]</small>
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UPDATE
Another great night last night. Saw OM at baseball game. I gave his sweatshirt back and told him we no longer had a use for it. I found out it was a sweatshirt that my wife wore on DD when she was with him talking things through after I found out what was going on. I do not understand why she didn't want to give it back, even after they made the split.
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Last night was another great night. Every thing seems so perfect. It was so easy for both of us to fall in love again.
I want to thank everyone that has posted on this tread. Your support and prayers have been tremendous.
Thank you especially to NCWalker for all of your honest advise. You are a great individual.
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Hustle,
Don't go there. I try and sometimes get it right. Frankly, most of the stuff I told I needed to hear myself as I am still in the fog with my WW.
Funny how God works, isn't it? We just have to be willing to walk in his will.
YOU are the great individual. YOU saved your marriage and family.
much love,
NCWalker
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Hustle,
As a FWW who slept with her now exH's best friend, and was not forgiven and ended up divorced (and still misses the love of my exH), I just had to tell you how amazed and impressed I am at how forgiving you've been to your wife. I think it is wonderful that you have forgiven her and in fact have found that </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> It was so easy for both of us to fall in love again. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Your wife is a fortunate woman!
Keep on loving her with your whole heart, and cut off all contact with OM and his family as well.
Jen
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NCWalker, Jen, Spider, Believer and everyone else I will be praying for all of you. I know I have been very fortunate and blessed.
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Wife and I had another great day yesterday. I saw OM and his spouse at my son's baseball game. They tried to talk to my wife and I. We pretty much ignored them. What can he be thinking? I wish I knew.
Keep the prayers coming.
Thanks
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Hustle,
SMACK. That was a 2x4. Who CARES what he is thinking? You got your wife and are well on the road to happiness.
5 years from now, on your anniversary, get good and drunk with the wife and laugh, laugh, laugh about the OM standing there with that confused dog look.
Not today. Today just appreciate what your wife is thinking.
NCWalker
PS - If he does pull you aside and ask what happened, tell him to come here. BIG NO NO for the wife to do that.
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NCWalker,
You are so right.
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UPDATE:
My wife, kids and myself went camping this past weekend. My wife was very distant. After three weeks of great recovery my wife was very distant. She said that she has lost the physical love for me. She seems more concerned about our lost friendship with our former best friends.
Now what? I need some help please.
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Hustle -
It's a rollercoaster. She'll come down more then she'll be up in the beginning. Give her time and continue supporting her. This is the toughest part of being the BS. We have to step up for our WS even when we feel they should be doing the stepping up. It's not easy. Easy would be walking away from your marriage...well it would be easier in the beginning but in the end you would realize what you left and regret it.
You are doing the right thing here...do not lose sight of that.
You love your wife.
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Heroswife,
Thanks for your words of encouragement. You said exactly what I needed to hear. I will follow your advise. That is how I was thinking anyway. It just seems so hard to have a set back after 3 excellent weeks.
And, yes I do love my wife. Because of my love I will keep plugging along. It is hard when things stop moving forward, as I am sure you are aware.
Thanks again and God bless.
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Update:
Last night was such an awsome eve. with the Mrs. This is an unbelievable roller coaster of emotions. We were both on cloud nine together last night. I look forward to a great future. I know there will be ups and downs. I just need to be patient.
God bless
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