My WW asked me the strangest question. She wants to know how I feel spending time with her and our children. She wonders if I get the “distorted” view that we are a family, when in her opinion, we are not. She wants my help in getting her medical practice started, goes on family outings with me, watches our favorite shows with me, but thinks we’re not a family She is the one who wants a D so she can experience her long distance lover more fully, but I’m distorting.

She also wanted to know how I was feeling physically and emotionally. She says that friends think I look fragile. What is she really asking?

Who knows what she is thinking? But I have seen LOTS of WS's say the same thing here. Spiderslayers WH even went to counseling just so they could end the marriage. He didn't want to give her any hope. They are reconciled now.

So stick with us, you'll get through this.

Stay strong brother!

You're right she's the one distorting. Think of her "malady" as a sickness, an addiction. If you've ever dealt with anyone in a full blown addiction, you know that it makes you do and say things that are completely out of character. She will even lie, cheat, steal to get what will satisfy her addiction. What breaks this addiction is No Contact with the OM. This is where some take a long time and some a short time. That's what plan A and plan B are about. Read up on all that.

I've been reading your posts and your wife sounds like she very well may need to get the hard cold taste of reality. That chasing her fantasy can be an expensive one, not just financially. Her medical practice that she wants you to help while she chases this OM >> no way! Stay strong. There should be some repercussions from her behavior. That's what the plan b is for. Don't do it in a vindictive way, but don't be a doormat for her either. Let her see you strong, determined, and with a plan and you're going to execute this plan with her (preferrably) and tell her that; or without her. She needs to know that you and your kids will be fine and move on without her. If she perceives you as weak she will run all over you.
(Read James Dobson's book "Love Must Be Tough")

Be strong Brother!