My FWW and I have been in recovery for about a month and a half. There's been NC for some time now. I am starting to believe that she is really committed to making things work. She stll says that she is afraid to talk to me, she opens up from time to time and I haven't been LB at all when she does. I truly am changing, I can feel it. The other night she really opened up to me and I was on top of the world, it was great. I was hoping that this was the dam breaking and then she would continue to pour out all these things that she has kept hidden for so long out. But, she has just clammed up again. Maybe it's going to be one of those things that comes a little now and a little later and so on... These months of darkness regarding her thoughts, feelings etc... finally some light pouring in on it was really great. It gave me a lot of understanding on why things are the way they are.

But, I just want more!!!! One of my FWW biggest problems was honesty and opening up. That's a lot of why the A happened in the first place, along with my good ole LB. She's just having to learn how to open up and be brutally honest. When I go without the openess, I begin to think... "why am I choosing to go through this junk?!" Why am I giving and giving and giving and she doesn't, and when I ask for it she gets short with me, like I've done something wrong.

I just want our marriage healthy again. And that's going to take honesty and openess.

Runningwithscissors,

Last week I've posted you a lengthy post and you never replied on it. I've given you some insight on the thoughts and strugglings of a FWS etc. Could my post be of any help to you? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<small>[ June 24, 2004, 09:24 AM: Message edited by: Suzet* ]</small>