Male harem? Yikes. That kinda hurts my feelings.

Certainly not my aim. I wish with all of my heart that Robby's wife will learn how to forgive him, he forgive her, and they somehow fix this mess they BOTH made in their marriage (as both Robby and Robby's wife have been BS & WS).

Not sure that Robby or CP or any other MBer has been any more supportive of me than they are of any other MBer on the board, but, I guess I can understand the mindset.

Thanks for the perspective Octobergirl.

Ok, NOW I'm upset. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

Are you ****ing kidding me?

I should go before I say more to offend... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

There is absolutely nothing untoward or inappropriate going on here...

It's a shame that needs to be explained!!!

Everyone go back to your appropriate cliques...

Robby,

I guess I can understand. People have a heightened awareness of friendships and associations here, and are ultra sensitive to the POTENTIAL of crossing boundaries.

I am not mad at Octobergirl. I respect and understand that she would want to question that.

We will always have that in the back of our minds, WS or BS, for the rest of our lives...is this relationship going too far, conflicting with my marriage, etc. Kinda a good thing, dontcha think? We will never make those mistakes again.

I have an immense amount of respect for your marriage...lil Robby, aka BUC linebacker, needs your marriage to survive. I know our friendship will never be inappropriate. We do not meet each others needs, besides very casual friendship, do not exchange any kind of pertinent personal information, barely know anything beyond the posted persona here...

Just get back to trying to heal your marriage, exchanging ideas on the site, and finding a safe place to rest your mind, with out the worry of venturing into unsafe, inappropriately personal, identifying conversations (like the kind you could have with a flesh and blood person right there). I think it safer to have friendships here when you are lost and lonely...than seeking them elsewhere, where they can quickly spin out of control.

I am not a popular person on the site...not the first time I have heard this feedback from MB posters. I guess my style gets too loose, too irreverent.

I don't mind the criticism, because there is nothing to defend.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I'm still missing it.

What, exactly, prompted that?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I am not a popular person on the site...not the first time I have heard this feedback from MB posters. I guess my style gets too loose, too irreverent.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Then I'm really surprised I haven't been banned!

What "crossed" a boundary?

I would think the cookie dough and facial parties would have been more worrisome!

Tell me, I need to know...

Just a lot of friendly talk about tans and bathing suits (maybe the thought of friendship with less clothing, even cyber clothing, seemed worrisome). Or maybe, it was something she wanted to point out long ago.

Either way, I am not worried. We have an innocent, PUBLIC friendship...so, no secrets here. Sheesh...our dialogue is more open to public scrutiny than the president and his friends.

Robby, again, I would rather people keep us on the up and up. We will always have the A possibility on our minds. And ya know, that is good. That is what Harley and the whole MB principle calls for. Ultra heightened awareness of the possibilities.

I have been monitoring you two. Your friendship is not crossing any boundaries I have seen. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

This whole affair mess we are in. Who can we talk to? I have no one but my MC and you guys. MC doesn't REALLY count since he hasn't gone through it.

FS OR BS - we have a camaraderie the rest of the world will not know, albeit an unfortunate one.

It is nice to sometimes talk to someone who just "knows."

Then you say "This," they just say "Yeah. I know."

Robby used a magic word with me once. I see a young man with his head screwed on straight. Who has made some mistakes and who is biding his time hoping for forgiveness.

DipiT and have have posted back and forth strongly to one another. I see a young woman who fought hard to save her marriage and held her head high in the process.

Both are alone, but really alone in that the "real" people around them don't KNOW.

I am asked at work "NCW, you seem sad." What do I say to that? How much effort would it take to explain what it is like? To listen to them say the...

Man, you shoulda left...
You oughta get yerself a girl...
I woulda killed the guy...

All talk from a group of people who don't know. Who aren't in the club. So now Robby and DipiT are just chatting. They can be sad and it's easy because they don't have to EXPLAIN the sad.

If two soldiers are chatting after facing combat because they now belong to a club, are the inappropriate?

So Robby is a guy and DipiT a girl. It is a public forum. This is not some chat room where they are ready to Alt-TAB to something else when their spouse walks in. Why would they choose to do this HERE of all places? A HUB of marital fidelity. Most of the time these two say GOOD things about their spouses.

We lost one 2 weeks ago because of this "scrutiny" and it was pretty sad to see it happen.

NCW

Well, NC, you are just about one of the most up and up people I know here in MB land, so a endorsement from you is worth a million.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I'm sorry if this observation induced anger.I knew it may but I'm sorry,robby,if you go back and read some of your posts to dipi,IMHO it's a bit too unorthodox and inappropriate for two people,in the midst of adultery,marriages on the rocks and a forum for trying to repair said marriages for statements like:

"I missed you"
"I'm so glad you're back"
"DipiT!!!!!" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> :
"Ok,I'm better now that you're back" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ETC

Not to mention songs,pictures out of keyboard keys,songs to dipiT not to mention flirtations back or what I would consider flirtations.I mean when I saw that castle a while ago,it threw me.The time,thought and effort to do that picture for someone that was at one time just another MB poster.I don't know of anyone else having this type of dialogue since I have been here.And hardly any women are posting anymore,it's dipi and robby for the most part.

All I am suggesting,take it or leave it,is if I came on here and saw all the discussion between the two of you as a spouse,I would be concerned.It makes me uncomfortable reading it and it's these types of "friendships",online or otherwise that are born innocently enough but can often turn into more.AND,the usual and most glaring point is that the friendship of most importance on this thread is between the opposite sex.This is not the time to encourage an opposite sex "friendship" in the manner I see IMO.

I used to post to you more dipi months ago.I don't know why but I really considered not saying anything.Maybe I shouldn't have.But NCwalkers feelings do not mirror my own.We have gone beyond discussion of how to repair your marriages.

I have not been compelled to interfere with anyone's discussion before until now so again,I do not mean to inflict any more pain on anyone here,we all have more than our share so continue on if you want.It is just an honest,from the heart observation as if I was there witnessing it all firsthand.I will not post to this thread again.

O

Thanks O, for your feedback.

As a classic conflict avoider, let's please let this stop here. No more responses, please.

She is right. I am no longer in Marriage building mode. And from the looks of this board day after day, with more and more really hurting people sharing their stories, there are much bigger fish to fry, and much more useful ways to use this resource, than the silly rantings of this thread.

This thread was closed at the thread-starters (SerendipiT ) request.