Hi Everyone,
I see many familiar names here, and many new ones. This website and the principles here helped me in so many ways. Thanks so much to all who replied to me when I used to come here so often.

For those of you who don't know me, I will tell my story as briefly as possible. I came here after my divorce was final, after I ended the A (An A that lasted four years), and by that point my H and I had been separated for two years.

I followed the principles here and basically did a post-divorce Plan A on my then exH. It all seemed hopeless, and I wanted to give up many times.

People here encouraged me. Redhat told me not to give up until my exH had remarried. I followed that advice, although it was hard to do a Plan A when my then exH was so unreceptive towards me.

The tide finally turned in late December, after I'd been coming here about 15 months. We went on our first date in late December, and we remarried just a few weeks later!

It's now been six months, and everything is going very well. Our marriage is better than ever. When you lose something very precious, you learn how to appreciate! I treat my husband very differently than I used to treat him, even before I started an A.

There are still reminders of the past at times. Once in awhile while going through paperwork, etc, I'll come across something from that awful time period. I've forgiven myself for what I did, but I still can't believe I did it. I will do my best to never judge another person again, after what I did.

I'm living in the present, as is my husband, and we're extremely happy. We really don't talk about the bad time period anymore at all. This summer marks 31 years that he and I have known each other, and this fall we'll celebrate our anniversary of our first marriage- 23 years.

Thanks again to all who helped me here. If you're new here, I welcome you and encourage you to follow the wisdom of Dr. Harley's principles. Don't give up! If my marriage could be saved AFTER divorce, most likely yours can be restored as well.

God bless,
HP

<small>[ July 07, 2004, 10:04 AM: Message edited by: hopeful_person ]</small>

Thanks for your encouragement! There are so many men here that are about to give up. You have proved that it is never hopeless.

Hi H_P,

It is so good to see you back for an update. You won't believe this but I was thinking alot about you today. There are a few people I am posting to that need to hear your story. I am going to guide them here and then to your first posts. I think they will open their eyes to what they stand to lose.

It is soo cool that you and H are doing well. I'll bet the kids are really delighted as well.

Must go.

God Bless,

JL

Thanks, JL and Believer.

JL, maybe a little angel told me to post today? Who knows!

We are all very happy. Our children are ecstatic, and it's great to see happiness in their eyes again. Divorce is truly a nightmare for so many. I think the media portrays it as such an 'okay' thing to do. For most of us, it's not the answer.


JL, please do guide people to my story. There's truly hope when it seems like there isn't any at all.

God bless,
HP

HP

blowing you kisses ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am sooooooo HAPPY and OVERJOYED with your wonderful news! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

***CONGRATULATIONS***

Your courage was / is inspiring.

Love,

Pep

<small>[ November 06, 2004, 10:30 PM: Message edited by: cellophane. ]</small>

thanks for sharing.

Hopeful,

I'm not familiar with your story, but can you give a little more detail as to the things you did to help your H open up to you and agree to give things another try?

thanks!!

we do love this type of stuff....

all those posts of yours..
all the rejection
the self searching
and reflection

just smiling

ark

Thanks H_P,
You just made my day.

SS

Hopeful Person,
I really need you! Other members suggested I write to you, as I am in a desperate postion. I too had an affair a year ago, but I kept in contact with the OM till my husband found out 6 weeks ago. Since then there has been no contact and I've been doing everything my husband asks. I am so scared though, I know I deserve to be divorced, but I love him more than life, and I'll do anything to save my marriage. My husband has already served me with separation papers, and he wants our divorce to be final by November. Please help, I know he is right to want out, but what can I do to buy us some time to try to patch thing up.

What works? What doesn't?

I am doing everything he asks, what else can I do?

Should I keep contacting him or should I just allow him to contact me? I want to be sure knows how bad I want to make this work.

Please help me hopeful person. In the meantime I will read all about your story, you are a true inspiration to all! Thanks!

<small>[ July 07, 2004, 11:30 PM: Message edited by: lostnlonelygirl ]</small>

H_P,

I am sooo glad and proud of U 2!!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Got me grinnin'. I remember those times of despair you had wonderin' what if.

Well I was just bragging about you on another thread..... hope you don't mind. Don't mean to get you off that 'honeymoon' yet but MB needs your help!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Hugz to you and your H.

All the best,
L.

What a great update H_P!!

Congrats to you and H! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Hurrah for you, HP! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Thanks so much to everyone for their replies. Your support and caring is so valuable to me.

My husband is the true 'hero' in all of this, I don't deserve any praise at all as far as I'm concerned. As far as my husband goes, I am still amazed that he has the grace and kindness to forgive and love me despite my outrageous, crazy behavior.

I won't have access to a computer for a few days.
Lostnlonely girl, I will post a thread to you today.

Take care and God bless,
HP

Thank you hopeful person...you are a true inspiration to me! I am thrilled to hear you and your husband are doing gret after all that's happened! I will not give up without a fight. My husband is completely justified in seeking a divorce, I don't derserve to be his wife any longer. Thank you for being a ray of hope amidst the clouds!

I have read a lot of your old posts...Wow!!! You are a hopeful person dispite it all!

<small>[ July 09, 2004, 12:20 PM: Message edited by: lostnlonelygirl ]</small>

Hey-

Remember me?

Gosh HP, I'm so Happy for you.


I wish my sittuatioin couldhave eended like yours did. At least one of us got there though.

I still have my samsara and I think of you often.

God Bless you and your family-

Kily

Thanks, Kily!

I think of you too.

Truly, at times I still can't believe things have worked out for us. I can't believe the pain I felt, and how I longed for my husband and how I thought he was gone forever.

God is good!

HP