Signs...yes I believe I have had a few. My first was pre-discovery. My H was working odd hours as everyone in company was during a few week crisis. One night out of nowhere I said out loud. "My H is having an affair." It hadn't even occured to me. But it was such a "stupid" thing to think, I put it out of my mind.<P>The night I did discover, I think the good Lord himself was giving me piece after piece of evidence until I knew and confronted.<P>Then a few weeks apart, several months into recovery, we were doing fine, but their was still distance and miscommunication. One night I prayed for a sign that things would get better. At that moment, and the whole thing was repeated a couple weeks later, my H rolled over in bed (he had been sleeping) hugged me and uttered "There...is that better?" It was incredible.<P>But the neatest thing God ever said was in church one day. Before the service I was mentally complaining that I had no time to do the artwork I love. Then an answer came..."That's alright, even if you don't have a chance to do it here on earth, you will in heaven." <P>When I get stressed, I think of this.<P>------------------<BR>Faith, Hope, Love Remain,<BR>but the greatest of these is Love.<BR>1 Corinthians 13:13

God has been so evident in this experience that it has almost been scary. <P>I woke up from a nap, with no thought in my mind other than to go to the bathroom. As I passed my H's always packed suitcase (his flight travel bag) a non-thought, honest to goodness, a no word thought, made me look in a side pocket. I don't know what I was thinking coz I had never looked in his bags for any reason in 17 years, but this time I looked in his bag. It was a week before Valentine's Day, so maybe I was peeking to see if he had a present or card there for me, but I don't recall thinking ANYTHING. Anyway, two love letters, on post cards, were in that side pocket from the OW.<BR>Discovery!!!!!<P>A week later I left H with the kids to drive 6 hours away to visit friends and sort my thinking out. I was a mess, contemplating divorce etc. The stupid radio was playing only love songs the whole trip because it was Valentine's week-end. I cried the entire 6 hours, praying, weeping and singing along sometimes. I stayed up with my friends until 2:00 am telleing my story and listening to their points of view. They are both very knowledgeable and firm in their Christian beliefs and were very supportive, but I still did not have a clue of what I should do about my marriage.<P>Now for the real kicker of a contact from God.<BR>The next morning, they were still sleeping and I wanted to drive around Mem. and revisit some of the places my H and I had been when we had lived there. I stopped for breakfast at a little diner. As I was sitting there waiting for my order, I large, Della Reese type Black Lady, her husband and two young boys walked in and took the booth backing against mine. I watched their happy banter and suddenly was overwhelmed with saddness at was going on in my life. I foungt the tears as best I could, yet they began coursing down my cheeks. I put my head down and covered my face so the tears would not be seen, but my shoulders were shaking with my silent sobs. The next thing I knew, that woman was scooting me over in the booth so she could sit down. She put her warm arms around me and hugged and hugged, saying, "You just let that old devil out of your heart. There is nothing God won't do for you."<BR>Within five minutes she knew the gist of the whole story, including the fact that my H is a non-believer. She said that would require some special praying, but with God nothing was impossible. She told me, that I had to give it all to God. To tell Him to "fix my man", that I could not do it myself. At that point, her 12 or 13 year old son, turned around and asked if he could pray for me. It was so sweet. He took my hand and prayed the most beautiful prayer. Tear flooding down my cheeks.<BR>After a few more minutes of talking and assurances from this woman she rejoined her family. As I left, her husband grabbed my hand and promised that they would all have me and my H in their prayers.<P>I left from there and went directly to a very large Prebyterian church to pray. All the doors seemed to be locked, but I found a way in. Once inside I could hear organ music, but could not find an open door to the sanctuary. After several locked doors and flights of stairs, I finally found my way through the choir loft, where the organist was practicing. I asked if she minded my being there. She said no, so for the next 45 min or so, as she play the most gorgeous music, I was on my knees praying for God to direct my life, reach my H and take control. I left with a new resolve that I could handle anything that was to come and that God was beside me all the way.<P>Other little things have happened since. My H is still an "unbeliever" but I do see evidence that my beliefs are influencing his thinking somewhat. Who knows what is to come.<P>

Pilots Wife,<BR>What an amazing story. Thank you for sharing it. I am having a really hard day and I don't know the reason, that story hit home.

I know what you mean about signs. That is how I found out about H's affair and just about everytime he lied to me about being with her. I didn't always want to believe them but they were always right. Now I wish I had some sort of sign that things were going to be all right. I am looking for a job, the one I thought was so perfect didn't happen, a place of my own. Right now I am living with my daughter and fer family. I know he would never come back as long as I am with her. He doesn't want to face her at all. He was very close to her. I keep Praying that I need help and I keep praying for him not necessarily to come back but to come to his senses.<P>------------------<BR>di