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#1157663 07/11/04 01:37 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 2,076
L
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L Offline
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 2,076
Haven't posted in a while. Not much to say. No change with WH. He's not calling me. I'm not calling him. Weekends are silent. I'm sure he's off doing his thing with OW.

DD has been home the last two nights on time. It's a refreshing change.

So why the 2x4's? I went to church this morning. And I tried hard to keep my mind on worship and the sermon--it was a very good one about putting out trust in God no matter how bad the circumstances may look.

But my mind kept wandering. The widower I've mentioned before that I have no business even noticing was absent this morning. He rarely misses. His kids were there. Found myself thinking stupid thoughts like "I wonder if he's visiting a church with a new lady?"

UGH! I am married! MARRIED! I cannot look and be thinking those kinds of thoughts. (Because it wasn't just out of curiosity. I do find myself wondering if he'd ever date me, or anyone. He's nice-looking. He's polite. Seems intelligent. And he meets my "widowed, never-married, or D because of infidelity" criteria...)

I know God may desire for me to be single for the rest of my life and to devote myself fully to him and to no one and nothing else. That was even sort of part of the sermon.

But I'm having a hard time not thinking about being with someone sometimes. Even though it's peaceful, it's lonely, and not something I relish the thought of doing for a lengthy period of time.

LL

#1157664 07/11/04 01:44 PM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 1,237
C
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Posts: 1,237
LL,
No 2x4s here. This is off topis. Sorry.

I noticed in you profile that your H is back to drinking. Have you been to any AA support type meetings for spouses or children?

Did H try AA?

cwmac

#1157665 07/11/04 01:53 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 2,076
L
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 2,076
Quick response: I have been to some Al-Anon meetings. Not since May. Need to go back.

Kids won't attend.

WH will not go to AA.

LL

#1157666 07/11/04 03:11 PM
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 3,474
C
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Posts: 3,474
Someone once posted the three C's of Al-Anon for us BSs: you didn't cause, you can't control, and you can't cure. You have two problems to deal with, alcohol and infidelity.

#1157667 07/11/04 07:52 PM
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
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Likes: 1
You won't be getting any 2X4's from me. I think it's a great sign that you are longing for a normal relationship with a kind, decent man who would respect and love you.

I know you are good enough to not act on it now, but I think it's a very healthy sign that you are thinking about it and envisioning a future without your H. What I would give to see you with a man who deserved you and treated you right.

#1157668 07/11/04 08:15 PM
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,455
D
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,455
No 2x4s here either.

Temptation is a real life thing. We all get it.

What matters is wether you act on it or not.

dewt


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