</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">But she is still trying to figure out were to go from here. I too am a beliver I dont always do the right thing but I have that little voice in the back of my mind telling something not always real clear but is there none the less I want to belive that we can make this a strong marrige one that we can both benefit and help one an other. But I some times feel like I would be cheating us if I stay becuase I dont know that I can forgive completely. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Cesar - Not "always doing the right thing" is normal for us humans. That's one of the reasons that God provides forgiveness through Jesus Christ when we confess and repent of our sins.

What to do? Two key points to get you and your wife started.

One, TRUST God, not yourselves or each other (at least not for some time to come).

Two, commit to OBEY God's commands whether you "feel like it or not." I think that and your wife would benefit from the pamphlet that I mentioned to SerendipiT called, "What Do You Do When Your Marriage Goes Sour?" IF you'd like it, drop me an email at mbforeverhers@yahoo.com and I'll send it to you.

God bless. Make PATIENCE your "by word" and wait on the Lord.

Hi again,

Just a note to say a few things--

One: Listen to FH when it comes to the Bible. I am NOT a spiritual leader and no expert.

I was emeshed into my church system for many, many years (Baptist). I studied the Bible and have been to Christian counselors to discuss my beliefs. I have been hurt by what I call "churchianity"... so now my relationship is with God (as I understand Him - a'la the 12 Step Programs) ALONE.

I am a Christian (and I agree with FH when he says you either are a Christian or not) I am not a fundamentalist nor do I believe in pushing my own beliefs down anyone's throat. I travel to the beat of my own relationship with God.

Two: FH is right that my paragraph should be tackled by taking it apart - if we are to discuss the finer points. I wasn't trying to do that... I was trying to lay out some beliefs that I have read on this site and elsewhere... and simply say that you can find Bible verses to support all sides of the issue of relationship, marriage and remarriage.

I am not here to judge. I am here to say what has happened on my personal journey and to offer support to you as you travel your path.

I have a great respect for FH, although it's been years since he and I travelled the same threads (I used to post as new_beginning, FH, if you remember me from those days)...

All I ask is that you take my experience and perhaps glean some insight in what to do, and not to do... I know I have learned a lot.

yipes... double post. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

<small>[ July 13, 2004, 11:49 AM: Message edited by: Nyneve ]</small>

Thanks...I agree with all your comments, and FH's comments. Thanks again for coming back to add another few thoughts. Come back anytime. I really enjoyed the comments that you both shared! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">it's been years since he and I travelled the same threads (I used to post as new_beginning, FH, if you remember me from those days)... </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Nyneve - Well "hi there" stranger! Now I begin to understand more about your post.

So if you are not a "fundamental" Christian, what parts of the Scripture have you decided to throw out as irrelevant and unimportant? Yes, that's a somewhat factious question, but there is also some truth in there. A Christian cannot be anything but a "fundamentalist" with respect to God's commands. HE is God, not us. HE commands, we obey. HE is sovereign, not us.

So I'm wondering if your "problem" with the members of your former church and with the idea of being a "fundamental believer" are grounded in the abuses of individuals or misapplication of Scripture than it is with YOUR choosing to be obedient to God's commands.

Also, my comment about your paragraph of essentially saying the typical secular accusation that you "can find a verse to support any position" and that "God didn't REALLY mean what He said" is just more twisting of Scripture that is usually done to support one's own desire to act in a sinful manner. It's nothing new. Satan used the same argument all the way back in the Garden of Eden.

Nyneve - You still sound like you are hurting over your past experience. Care to start a thread where we can talk about it a little more?

God bless.

<small>[ July 14, 2004, 05:35 AM: Message edited by: ForeverHers ]</small>

SerendipiT, please forgive the tiny threadjack...

Hi FH!

I wouldn't mind discussing this further, but you need to know a few things first.

One, our computer is about to take the big dirt nap... motherboard has been threatening to die for about six months now and today it took over an hour to get on the internet... so... if you decide to begin a thread, just know that I might not be able to participate fully... but then again I might... it's all about how long it takes to get in and if the 'puter finally does actually just kack.

Second, while I have a great respect for you and for your beliefs (and make no mistake - I do!!) I am the kind of Christian that will raise your ire and cause you copious amounts of frustration.

I am the jaded Christian who believes the Christ died on the Cross for my sins, yes... but... my beliefs are "in my heart" and "feel right"...

If you would like to begin a thread for us to discuss this, I am game. But... just know that it may move rather slowly due to the computer probs and my work schedule (I can only write in the morning or very late at night from Tues-Sat).

If you decided not to... that's okay too. We're cool either way. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Just let me know...