You are an awesome mother!

Many prayers for your son and for your family!

pep---you know my prayers are with you. i am in a similar situation with my 14 yr old son. the tough love is the hardest part....letting them fall. i spent a month screaming at every agency meant to help parents in crisis to do something and help me.....none would or could.(you wouldnt believe the non-help on this issue)

i got so pi$$ed i finally decidied to do it myself.....worked in concert with our local police. son was missing for three days at the time and i knew he was in trouble....(relapse) so i figured out where they were and went with the police.....found out they were hiding in this one kids house and we could smell the pot from outsid....i looked at the officer and said"you gonna go in there and get my kid?". well, as i turns out he couldnt----he couldnt go in and get him. so i told him---well there isnt anything stopping me...i kicked the door in and went in!!! we found them all high as a kite and in really bad shape. had them all arrested and warned everyone of them that when they saw my kid from now on...know i will be ten steps behind---i will continue to make life miserable for each and every one of you as long as i need to!

his court date hasnt come up yet, but he is in rehab again and doing well. he goes to meeting every night and seems to be gettin it this time.

it is sooooo hard watching our kids fall.....going to court is gonna be tough for me. i let him confess and i will not get him an attorny----i will tell the judge, i know he's a minor, but i will not be paying any fines---fine him or let him work it off, but you will not be getting the money from me. send me off to jail if you want---i need the vacation! he is gonna be toally responsible for this one. oh yeah--the kids we busted with him---these cops have been trying to get for like 3 years! they are all in rehab now and seem to be doing well also.

you are doing great.....you know it and my prayers are with ya!! hang in and hang tough.

"Louie" huh? does he play a mean trumpet?

He is a musician.... drum and guitar.

I love Louie Armstrong.... especially when he sang "It's a wonderful world."

Thanks everyone...

Nikko... We'd had a ton of help. Mostly because Louie was adopted from the state.... and he was considered high risk due to his pre-adoption circumstances, so we've had financial as well as other help. Plus, we push, hard. The local school system sent him to a great non-public school. The state sent him to 2 residental treatments, one in state, the second out-of-state... which was in Utah.... and it was an amazing program. If you are interested, I'll be happy to email you about the Utah program. There are some excellent ones in Texas too. All very expensive however.

And, most amazing of all..... Louie has never been arrested! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> Every one of his rides in the back of a police cruiser were to the emergency room, so he could be put on a 72 hour psych hold. One lucky boy my Louie.

Pep

<small>[ July 19, 2004, 11:28 AM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

Pep,

Your approach is correct. I, unfortunately, have lots of experience with this from members of the family, but I can tell you from experience that you cannot help/save them unless they want to help themselves. Everything else is a waste of time/resource.

I'll be praying for you. Keep you strength. I think Louie will be alright.

Kati

Pep,

You caught me lurking *and* brought me out of the shadows.

I remember reading an email from OW to my FWH, and she said "I don't understand your W. *I* certainly wouldn't stand around and be a doormat the way she is doing."

I knew then that I was a lot stronger than she was, and that sometimes the very hardest thing to do is nothing. That I had an internal strength and serenity some folks don't find, or choose not to develop.

You have an *amazing* inner strength and serenity, Pep. I am SO PROUD of you for "doing nothing". It is so hard, especially with children.

Love to you, and yours.

Praying for all of you Pep--I've been where you are and it is so hard to watch someone fall and not know how far it will ultimately be...

In addition to sobriety I am praying he also finds Christ.

pep..

prayers of strength and fortitude as always...

may there also be times of respite...and the knowledge that Gods grace is nigh...


Nikko strength to you and yours as well

ARK