Well, I tried to stay busy, I mean BUSY.

SO I cleaned, scrubed, vacumed, washed, you name it. DD had a BD party at 4pm, so I sent her to the pool, and S went along too. They swam in a freezing water. bUt they had fun. After that, S and I went to Madonald to have our dinner.

Wh came home 12:30 am. He told me he was coming home for dinner, then he called and told me that he is not coming, I don't care. I just wished he get in a big crash and die, then I don't have to deal with him any more.

Now I am going to relax and watch a little bit TV and go to bed, of course, pray before that.

Lostnhurt, Ive been following your story for a long time. It seems to me that you are beginning to lose feelings of love for your husband. this is a definate indicator for moving on to Plan B. remmeber that one of the purposes of Plan B is to preserve your love...think about it....

OW's H called. She filed for DV on 7/7.

I will go to plan B, but need to send DD to camp first. WH came home this morning 6am, and went to work at 8am. What is the point of coming? It didn't bother me anyway.

OW's H called. She filed for DV on 7/7.

I will go to plan B, but need to send DD to camp first. WH came home this morning 6am, and went to work at 8am. What is the point of coming? It didn't bother me anyway.

DD was up whole night, she said she couldn't fall in sleep b/c she watched scary movie on the BD party. She also felt sick with sore throat and caugh, maybe she caught a cold from swimming yesterday. The weather here is like Fall now. There was no summer this year. Because of this, I don't know whether I can go to have my blood tested.

hey lost, well this (ow's file for D) might explain some or your H's additional behavior but regardless you know what to do. get all your ducks in a row, get an appt w/SH and continue to give it all to God, you are capable of more than you ever thought, just look back to how far you've come and i think debbra's right about losing feelings for H and the timing of plan B. keep us posted. i can't type much right now, continued prayers for you always, RR

lostnhurt -

Well does OW's H finally believe you? Now at least it is out in the open. So you know exactly what you are facing.

Did you go to the doctor yet?

WH came home to pick me to his Dr. office. There the Dr. explained to us what could had happened. And Wh said he had been a carrier since he was 10(?), but he never knew that it could be transmitted sexually. I can verify that with his parents. Then the Dr. told me not to worried, I would either be not infected and get vacination, or already been infected and was immuned. I don't really understand, but I worried about the kids. Then she said that the kids would not, unless I was a carrier when they were born. WH tried to comfort me and said that let's wait for the result before anything. But I have different dr., I just made the appointment for Monday morning. He kept telling me that it is good for the Dr. to explain to us. I think that he kind of get scared. He said that he forgot to ask whether he can drink under his condition, OW likes to drink. Ah, it gets him.

lostnhurt - Good news! I doubt that you were exposed if WH had it since he was 10. (if WH is being truthful about it). But why wouldn't he have told you before?

Anyway, get tested. My kids dad was a carrier and I never got it, so I think you will be fine too.

LNH,

I've sort of been in my own little world and haven't kept up well on the other posts over the last few days.

I just got a chance to catch up on yours. You're doing much better than I would have about the Hepatitus B thing. I would probably have immediately assumed it came from SF from the OW if my WH had it (and that assumption may well have been very wrong).

It's good you are trying to get all the facts.

As for OW filing for D, I think this says a lot. Maybe her H will be able to help, or maybe he'll just allow it to go through.

Has your H said anything about it? Has he been home lately?

I feel for your pain. I know you were doing so well in Toronto and it has to be hard to come back and face the same old thing again (though it did sound like he was doing better, at least initially).

You are strong though, much stronger than you were back early in the year.

LL

oops...double post.

<small>[ August 06, 2004, 08:45 PM: Message edited by: lordslady ]</small>

Lostnhurt,
St. Paul said something like, "It is in weakness that I am made strong." Look at the impact on your health and your children of what is going on. Seeing your weakness and that of your children, maybe you can see Plan B as a necessary form of self-protection and protection for your children.

My heart goes out to you.
Cherished

Lost - I am pregnant right now and when I went for my first doctors appointment they tested me for everything, standard practice. So chances are you were tested when you had your last child. If you go to the same doctor, you may want to ask.

I feel that I have not much to post now, same old stuff, WH coming and gone.

Friday evening, he actually came home for dinner. It happened that evening a friend came over to visit, she thought we were still the same old. I just didn't know what to say. Cousin called to have lunch on Sat. and a friend called to go to an outdoor concert on Sat. evening. I asked him whehter he wanted to go, he said he will see. Then he said we will go to lunch.

On sat. morning, he got up early and just sat in front of the computer again like a statu. I spent my time in the yard. Then we went to lunch, he acted like nothing had happened. Another cousin also came along, she knew alittle bit. She kept saying to WH, look how nice your family is, you got to set a good example to your S. Then she said, you need to leave now, don't you have other place to go? I was so suprized. WH told her on the phone that we will go see the movie at 2pm without telling me. I would have been mad before, but I am numbed now and I don't care. So I went along and watched Around the World in 80 Days. It was a fun movie.

After that DD said she needed more clothes for her camp, we went shopping. But S didn't like it. WH took him to the icecream shop to wait for us. It was almost 5pm when we met together. Then WH told me to call friend about coming to our house to go to the concert together. It was another surprise to me again. He never told me that we were going. SO I called, she said that they were going to buy some food before coming to the house at 6pm, we were going to have a picnic at the concert. I said what? SHe said I told your WH, didn't he tell you? I said no. The 3rd surprise!!

I told him why didn't he let me know? He said, oh, it was nothing, we just all take food over there and eat together. When we came home, he was packing the food, cutting up the water melon and all the things. That was his way to say sorry, he never apologize anything to me.

But anyway, the concert was good, it was Tzyckovski(sp??) Spetecular. S could not sit still during the concert. So WH took him out for walks and bought him pops and chips. If he was not there, I won't be able to listen. We came home at 11pm. I was so tired and went to bed straight. It was a fun day except those surprises(I don't like them). I thought about the pros and cons of having this WH. Pros: he could drive, so I caould sleep, he could take S away while I was shopping and listening concert. Cons: He is not faithful, he did not respect me. I weighted both, there were more cons than pros. It may help me to go closer to Plan B.

It is the same old again, WH disappeared after we went to church and still somewhere out there. I don't care and I don't want him to be here. I have to go to bed early so I can see the Dr. tomorrow at 8am.

I feel that I have not much to post now, same old stuff, WH coming and gone.

Friday evening, he actually came home for dinner. It happened that evening a friend came over to visit, she thought we were still the same old. I just didn't know what to say. Cousin called to have lunch on Sat. and a friend called to go to an outdoor concert on Sat. evening. I asked him whehter he wanted to go, he said he will see. Then he said we will go to lunch.

On sat. morning, he got up early and just sat in front of the computer again like a statu. I spent my time in the yard. Then we went to lunch, he acted like nothing had happened. Another cousin also came along, she knew alittle bit. She kept saying to WH, look how nice your family is, you got to set a good example to your S. Then she said, you need to leave now, don't you have other place to go? I was so suprized. WH told her on the phone that we will go see the movie at 2pm without telling me. I would have been mad before, but I am numbed now and I don't care. So I went along and watched Around the World in 80 Days. It was a fun movie.

After that DD said she needed more clothes for her camp, we went shopping. But S didn't like it. WH took him to the icecream shop to wait for us. It was almost 5pm when we met together. Then WH told me to call friend about coming to our house to go to the concert together. It was another surprise to me again. He never told me that we were going. SO I called, she said that they were going to buy some food before coming to the house at 6pm, we were going to have a picnic at the concert. I said what? SHe said I told your WH, didn't he tell you? I said no. The 3rd surprise!!

I told him why didn't he let me know? He said, oh, it was nothing, we just all take food over there and eat together. When we came home, he was packing the food, cutting up the water melon and all the things. That was his way to say sorry, he never apologize anything to me.

But anyway, the concert was good, it was Tzyckovski(sp??) Spetecular. S could not sit still during the concert. So WH took him out for walks and bought him pops and chips. If he was not there, I won't be able to listen. We came home at 11pm. I was so tired and went to bed straight. It was a fun day except those surprises(I don't like them). I thought about the pros and cons of having this WH. Pros: he could drive, so I caould sleep, he could take S away while I was shopping and listening concert. Cons: He is not faithful, he did not respect me. I weighted both, there were more cons than pros. It may help me to go closer to Plan B.

It is the same old again, WH disappeared after we went to church and still somewhere out there. I don't care and I don't want him to be here. I have to go to bed early so I can see the Dr. tomorrow at 8am.

DD has to pack for her camp and we are leaving Tuesday morning. WH will come along and we will spend a day by the lake, and over night. I will just enjoy whatever I can have now worry things tomorrow later.

Just came back from Dr.'s office. SHe told me that I was immunized. I had a blood work doen in Feb(I don't remember) that I was ok, but she will do it again to reassure me.

WH didn't come home till 1:30am. I didn't see him at all, I don't care. But the kids didn't see him, that is what I feel sad about.

Well that is sure good news. Now we can all relax. At least something has come out good.

I had a great weekend. While I was fishing, my friends came over and decorated my sun-room with an Asian theme. Kind of like the TV show "While You Were Out". I was really surprised.

Things are the same with WH. OW has been staying with her WH at night. I think they are trying to trick me.

Hope your day goes well.

Believer, why are you up so early? I saw you posted everywhere. It is nice to have a friend like your. I hope that your WH will wake up some day, let go of OW. I just don't see any hope in my end now. I will make appt. with SH to talk about next step.

lost, make the call/make the appointment. after you talk to SH then you can put things off. don't put off making the appt, SH' schedule fills up pretty quickly.

i have my next session tomorrow. i'll give SH an update but i think my "plan" needs some readjustment and i definitely need some new material. i'm not out of hope just a lacking a little energy right now but trying not to let that get to me.

continued prayers to you, RR

thinking of you, do you have your appt w/SH yet? hope so, continued prayers to you, RR

RR, I had made the appt. w/SH on Tues before leaving. The appt is 11:30 today. Please pray for me.

As you knew, DD had a fine art camp for almost two weeks, it started yesterday. WH came home around 1:30am on Sun(should be monday), then left for work in the morning. He came home at normal time Monday evening having dinner with us, then took garbages out and packed. We left Tuesday morning, with about 2 1/2 hours drive, we were close to the camp which is on the west sied of Michigan by lake Michigan. S wanted to go sand dune, but WH said it was too cold and rainy, we ended up in a Garden with a lots of walk. It was a nice family time, I wish there are more in the future and our family satyed together like that. Then we went to the hotel and swam. THe whole atmosphere was good, we even joked to each other.

But at night, S's nose was stuffed. He kept sniffing, nobody could sleep except DD. Finally at 1am, Wh got up and took S out, he went to a store to buy Benedryl. That only kept S sleeping for about 2 hours. Finally, at 6am, I took S out for breakfast. Everybody was tired.

We dropped DD to her camp at about 10am. There were so many people, the camp was huge. She needed to walk at least 15min one way to have food. Wheather was groomy, wet and cold, temp at 50. We helped her to settle down, had lucn together, and had her audition and left. WH kept saying to give DD money, I said that I alreay deposited the money and she can have it anytime she wanted. He said that what if she didn't know how. But finally we just left. We all felt sort of sad, of course tired. S kept saying he wanted to go to sand dunes, but fell asleep in 5 min.

We came home in the early afternoon. WH stayed home and how he went to work. I just don't know what is going on now. I wish he is coming back, but he stayed out late. When he was home, I felt that we can communicate and the atmoshpere was good. SO what am I going to do? Maybe SH can help me.