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#1160905 07/20/04 09:24 AM
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
K
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K Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
Help Anyone?

Am almost done reading HN/HN. I have learned soooo much. Wish WH would read it also.

I'm sure WH is still seeing OW. He's trying to make his decision. Decision to what? Figure out who's the best? Makes me sad.

Still keep trying to show him I'M THE BEST!!!

Problem is, do I press FORWARD, and tell him I know that he is still seeing her, and tell him he needs to stop? Or should I just keep quiet on this? I'm afraid it will turn into one of those endless "triangles".

He keeps telling me she's nice, not a homewrecker.
I want to scream "SHE'S ALREADY WRECKED OUR HOME!"

Now what? What do I do? What do I say? I am almost afraid to bring up the subject for fear that it will drive him away.

I'M THE BEST, damn it!!!! Please help. K

Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 17,837
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Tell him nothing. No R talk. You continue to get better. He will see it. As the A progresses, you will look better because of your plan A and self improvement efforts and the OW won't because she just can't hold her breath to keep her figure in place that much longer. LOL!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Just sit back and watch. If he complments you, tell him thanks. Don't give him too many compliments. WS' don't know how to handle compliments well.

Keep the ILYs to a bare minimum. Save your R talk when your H has moments of sanity. Periodically ask to speak to your real H. When he morphs to the WS image, stop all conversation and leave his presence or ask him to leave your home.

JMHO,
L.

Joined: Jul 2004
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Thanks Orchid

I will say nothing. I just keep being my best non-LBing self. But need more advice...

We are going camping next week....when we get back his band is playing for 2 nights at a nearby town. OW will probably show up (I don't really know what she looks like).

What do I do? I want to say "please don't have her be there" Or do I just go and try to enjoy myself anyway? Should I mention my fears to him?

I am soooooo shakey!!! This whole thing is killing me..... but I know "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger". ARGHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Joined: Oct 2000
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his band is playing for 2 nights at a nearby town.

YES! An opportunity...

OW will probably show up (I don't really know what she looks like).

OK .... get yourself all beautiful, I mean be a knock out!

What do I do?

Hold on....

I want to say "please don't have her be there"

Nooooo don't do this... be cool <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

Or do I just go and try to enjoy myself anyway?

You don't "just go", you GO showing great pleasure to be there as your H's biggest & sexiest supporter!!!

Should I mention my fears to him?

Why? Do you think fear makes you more attractive? I doubt it....

Listen.... BE there with bells on... and BE BACKSTAGE the entire time....

Be by his side, or just off stage, the entire night.... But be joyous and beautiful and a stunning engaging delightful person to everyone you meet.

I think this is the way to go....

Make this the Plan-A night of nights....

Then seduce him later.....

Give him something to think about.... "My wife is *something wonderful* .... what a great woman."

Then later, if he does not end the affair .... you've got THAT special night of great sexy memories implanted in his brain.

Have fun camping too!

Take your anxieties and shove them into the storage room of your mind for now.... this is not the time for confrontations.... this is the time for music, and love and great sex.... create an image of yourself he's not likely to forget!

Pep

Joined: Jul 2004
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THANKS PEP!!!

I think I'll print out your reply and keep it with me. Have already read it twice.

He is spending more time with me. Wants me to meet him for dinner tonight before band practice. Also, meeting him tomorrow night as it is our anniversary.

Hoping for the best. These are all good signs, right?

Thanks, K

Joined: May 2004
Posts: 403
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Of course you are the best, K!

Things are progressing as you said...keep up the good Plan A.

Camping is another opportunity to kick some butt in the Plan A department. Make sure you two are well-fed and wear the cutest outfits so that he can't help but stare at your eyes in the firelight.

Good luck, K!

Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
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K Offline
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Posts: 1,142
Dear What, Orchid, Pep and all...

God bless you guys for being here with good advice. I'll take it to heart.

THANKS, K


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