I have posted on here before but for different issues. This one is becoming far beyond what I wanted out of my life.
A little background, when H and I met he had a few tattoos on his arms and chest and some piercings. I met him 4 years ago and we have been married for the same. It was all unconditional back then as it still should be now, but it has gotten way out of hand. The tattoos are one thing, but then there are the body modifications and piercings. One thing led to another and now he cannot control any of it. I don't condone anyone who does this including my husband, but there is a limit to it with what he has chosen for his professional life. Others who are heavily into the tattoos and piercings have chosen to be tattoo artists or piercers themselves. With his lifestyle he cannot do these things. He has stretched his earlobes to a dispoportionate size, he has a ring in his nose which he puts inside, he has done some pretty icky things in my eyes. The most recent being that he went to a tattoo BBQ that he hosted and ended up coming home with his head shaved. HE is trying to tell me that it was an accident because he just wanted a haircut from who he thought because he was told a professional hairdresser, and ended up with a shaved head. There is something I don't believe there. I have had enough of all this and I have put up with a lot. I have even stuck up for him to his family and I am tired of doing that too. I am so angry at him that I don't even want to go home. I won't look at him or anything or give him the time of day except for every day necessities. I have a 2 1/2 year old son and I have to figure out how not to let this affect him, but I am sure it will.
If I had somewhere to go I would just be away from him for a little while.
Ask away if you have questions, because I am sure I will have the answers.
Thanks.

I had one little tattoo and one earing hole (no ring for about 4 years, but the hole was still there) when my wife and I met. Still only have the one little tattoo and did put an earing back in. Wife had no tattoos.

After we met, wife got a little tattoo on her back (seven years ago). Then last year (probably when she felt we were starting to have problems and didn't bother to tell me) she got a belly button ring and a larger tattoo across the lower part of her back - very noticeable and draws a lot of attention. Then, just two weeks prior to me learning of her affair she got her tongue pierced. I think that she did these to get attention. I have heard of people being addicted to the rush of getting tattoos/piercings, but I think her's were for the attention.

Could this be a cry for attention?

Since I sport a few (and am planning to continue), you may take my input as biased or not....

BUT: Isn't it a financial strain to keep inking? I mean, we're common folks, dh and I, and we SAVE to get inked - and only do so with each other's input...and LOTS of discussion. It's not like a something you can just get rid of.

Same with the piercing - tho I only have one alternative piercing and it's not so alternative anymore, dh doesn't have any. If it's expensive and if it's a turn off to your mate...why do it?

Sounds like your dh has an addiction. Some people are addicted, imo, to ink and piercing. If it's affecting his job/marriage, it's def. an unhealthy thing.

- Kimmy

For attention from me? Certainly not, I will look the other way. If he thinks that it is his cry for help because we are having other problems in our marriage it is driving me further and further away from him. I am not as attracted to him as I used to be and it is getting worse because of what he continually does. I liked the tattoos in the beginning but it all got out of hand completely and he took it all way too far. He never said he was going to do all this, he thinks he remembers telling me but I don't remember him telling me, so I think our pathes got crossed there somehow. You would think that I would remember somethings like that. He had his tongue pierced before I met him and had taken the thing out, but then later decided that he wanted to put it back in because he got the crazy notion to split his tongue like a serpent of some sort. So he decided to try to do it himself one afternoon when I was not there. He was with our son at the time and ended up having to call his friend to help him with our son because it wouldn't stop bleeding and he wanted to go the ER. Well he tried to lie his way through it to me telling me it was accident and like I believed him. THE NUT!! Well now he is trying to do the same with his shaved head, and I am not believing him.
I am tired of it, and I am not going to stick up for him any longer to anyone. I will call him a fool over trying to make it sound like it is alright.

Niosgirl,
When I first met him he had just tattoos on the front of his arm and on his chest on both sides. I love those ones. He went on to have both arms done in sleeves, but it was from a dude that is in prison right now for various break and entries. At the time it was for publicity for him, and so it was for free, but while he was in prison he could only call collect to us and we ended up paying a few hundred dollars in phone bills. So the work was free but we ended paying the phone bills instead.
SO DH now has full sleeves of tattoos on both arms, a full list of piercings and things that I won't mention.
And yes it is truly affecting his marriage not to mention his career.

Lost at Exit 93, Wow. Sounds like my WW too. Only sans the tattoos, for now. Got her some plastic surgery, then her belly button (always swore that was gross) and shopped incessantly for belly button rings. Bought short skirts and tight shirts. She bought them. Now she blames me for making her dress that way. But she hasn't stopped. In fact she got more short skirts and tight shirts just last week. Go figure.

I think your right it was all to get attention. Feed her need for attention and build her self-esteem I guess.