I have caught my husband talking to girls and having what you call "internet sex." He told me each time he doesn't mean to and he doesn't know why. I hug him everyday and offer him sex all the time. We do have sex often and he says he loves me very much. We are moving to another state and I found that he had been in another sex related chat room. He said he was just bored and messing around. He swears that he didn't do anything and he loves me very much. I can't help but not to believe him. I My worry is he will be in the other state about a month before I get there..what will he do while I'm not there? What can I do to make things better before he goes?
I read the beginning of an affair can start from internet sex.

bump for mizz grizz

Mizz,

My wife was involved in an internet relationship. It was not sexual, but that does not mean that it wasn't intimate. It was leading towards a meeting when I stepped in. There are a lot of people here who have been down this road and a lot of them will give you different advice. If it was me I would install E-blaster or some kind of spy software on your computer. You can the see every email, chat, posting everything that comes from the computer. At least then you will know exactly what is going on. You may want to tell hubby that it has been installed and that you will be monitering the computer activity. That might be enough to get it under control. BUT it might make him install counter spy softwear, or take some other measures to block you. I feel sorry for you. It drove me nuts to see my wife get pulled in deeper and deeper with her internet boyfriend. She kept sying they were just friends, but I was reading every word and I could see it developing into more. When I saw (because of the softwear) that they were planning a meeting I was able to intervine before any physical contact between them.

Some will say that is a violation of privicy, but I say that you are intitled to know everything about spouces sex life! And you are not only entitled, but it is your responcibility to follow your instincts and investigate his behavior if you feel it may affect your marriage and your family!!


Good luck!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by mizz_grizz:
<strong> I have caught my husband talking to girls and having what you call "internet sex." He told me each time he doesn't mean to and he doesn't know why.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">That sounds like addiction to me. Part of any addiction is the insanity. Doing something and not knowing why you do it is insanity.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>I hug him everyday and offer him sex all the time. We do have sex often and he says he loves me very much.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If it is addiction, your hugs and even sex will not address the issue. He needs to discover why he is doing this.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>We are moving to another state and I found that he had been in another sex related chat room. He said he was just bored and messing around. He swears that he didn't do anything and he loves me very much. I can't help but not to believe him.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">An addict can most certainly love you and still “act out”. However, I would question his answer that he was “just bored and messing around”.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>I My worry is he will be in the other state about a month before I get there..what will he do while I'm not there? What can I do to make things better before he goes? I read the beginning of an affair can start from internet sex.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I would recommend counseling for you both. If he does not see his actions as a problem, he is unlikely to work on find an answer. I would recommend the book “Every Man’s Battle”. However, it is unlikely that he would read it if you bought it for him. But, it might be helpful if you read the book, to better understand the issues.

My worry is he will be in the other state about a month before I get there..what will he do while I'm not there? What can I do to make things better before he goes? I read the beginning of an affair can start from internet sex.

This may sound a little strange but my suggestion is that you arrange to meet him online every evening whilst you are apart....maybe you guys could have cyber sex! This will certainly mean that you can account for what hes doing and who hes doing it with....just a thought....