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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 39
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 39 |
Well after 2 wks of tring to get ahold of OMW. I finaly did. OM and his W are in counsuling and working on things. There has been NC between WW and OM for 1 wk outside of work. Now WW has realy become distant to me. Says she's very mad at me for exposing it and taking her true **** from her. This is hard, I did this calculated LB but now I can't help to ease her pain. I know she is still fogged by this A. But when and how will I know to start refilling her EN that he was filling. Since she will not speak to me on this matter.
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 218
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 218 |
Fight the alien - love your wife - remember that the alien will try to beat you off and will curse your etc.
Just keep trying to meet those needs - eventually she will have to cave in.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 944
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 944 |
I revealed the A too and my W was livid for 2 weeks followed by depression for another week...
Her anger will subside eventually.
You did the right thing based on my experience.
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 218
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 218 |
Fight the alien - love your wife - remember that the alien will try to beat you off and will curse your etc.
Just keep trying to meet those needs - eventually she will have to cave in.
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996 |
Originally posted by knowtomuch:
[ Says she's very mad at me for exposing it and taking her true **** from her.
Let her be as mad as she wants to be...
Her emotional rollercoaster is not in your control.
Think about this logically .... you exposed an affair to stop it from being kept a secret....
Your wife's anger is in part because her "love" did not stand up for her but instead returned to his wife...
You've saved your wife... but don't expect a "thank you" ... let her anger wash over you like water. Just hold your breath, and then come back up for air once the wave has passed.
Now, in order for the affair to continue, they will have to go to extraordinary measures to keep it from both spouses.
This brings the misery of a secret affair to an end sooner rather than later.
Pep
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 39
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 39 |
2 months of fighting this evil has wore hard on me. I thought that this would give me a new breath, but her angry words still cut a deap path and it is hard for me to let them wash off. I know I must do this if we are to ever start reconsiling. I will not give in to this.
We had a good conversasion last night when I dropped our kids off. We never even brought up us or the A. That was nice, but it ways heavily on the mind. Knowing that recovery will not come till she starts talking about it. Time is starting to be my new eniemy here. I pray my love for her will prevail once again.
Do I dare bring the NC letter into play now?
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