Long, long story. Short version is WH came over tonight and we talked for first time since I asked him to leave yesterday. It seems that he is giving up. He has asked for a few days to think and make decisions. I told him that if that is what he needed, OK. I told him I loved him and was willing to work with him on this but he had to meet me 1/2 way. He says he has made no decisions but it seems like he is filled with self-loathing and has already decided that there is no way to fix this mess we are in. His parents found out last night and it has devastated them and that has devastated him. He said my calling OW scared her. I have to say GOOD! I hope it scared her enough to keep her pants on and away from my H. I have made arrangements for my son for Wed-Fri so I think I am going to leave town and go stay with my sister. I need to sort things out too and make decisions and it is very hard to do in our house, this house where I know she has been.
I only got about three hours sleep last night so I am going to try to go to bed and sleep. Please pray for me and us. I need to pull myself togther if only for my son. Lord, help us all.
Good night. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

My prayers are with you and your H and your M...

Semper Fi,
RIF90

Sis,

I haven't had a chance to keep up with many posts lately and admit I've not read any of yours but this one.

You are feeling a LOT of pain right now, and rightfully so. If you can get away for a little while to take your mind off of it, that's great.

Not knowing your situation, I can't say much, but it sounds like finding out about the OW and the A are all a recent development. If so, I will assure you the pain and the shock does subside with time.

I've been at this for some time and my situation and yours may be very different. However, when I first found out about the A I was in shock followed by a LOT of pain! I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat (the "infidelity diet" is something many of us have experienced)...just couldn't function.

It took a good 6 months before I really got my act together again, but at this point I feel pretty good most of the time.

Hang in there. Your son needs you. Stay focused and don't let your emotions get the best of you. Stay active physically. I don't formally exercise, but I do a lot of little things around the house. Sometimes it helps just to get up and go fix myself a cup of coffee or tea and get off my rear.

Don't dwell too much on your WH's statements. I'm sure he does loathe himself right now. Just let him know you love him. Have you read SAA by Dr. Harley?

LL

My thoughts and prayers will be with you. Hold on this is going to be a bumpy rollercoaster ride and it does not resolve itself overnight. You need to be in this for the long ride. Have you exposed the A? Are you in Plan A? What are you doing for yourself? You need to be taking care of yourself during this time so you can take care of your son.

Your WH will say lots of things during this time taht just won't make sense. Just knowing this will help you cope. Decide what you want and set a plan in place to get there.

Sis I can identify with your desolation. I am not sure my prayers hold much sway with the Almighty just recently but I will pray for you and your situation. Go kiss your son and remember why you are fighting so hard. Its what I do.

God bless you, and grant you peace.

Ask and you shall receive. prayers are definitely w/you and will be for God's will to be done in your life, your H's life, and in your M. there are many scriptures that will mean a lot more to you today then they did years ago but read the following: Proverbs 3:5-6, Mark 11:24, Philippians 4:6-7, Luke 18:27, I Thes 5:17,21; I Cor 1:23-31.

sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and i'm confident God will give you some clarity on doing what is needed. i don't know the whole story but if your H were to wake up tomorrow, completely be done w/OW and want to rebuild the M, you are still looking at a rough road and a long one at that. so stay the course, you're in a race but it's a marathon, not a sprint. save your energy in order to finish the race. that's what you want to do-finish the race. you are capable of more than you ever dreamed. while your away read all you can and learn all you can. there are many helpful resources out there, starting w/His need her needs by Dr. Harley.

Dr. James Dobson's Focus on the Family webiste family.org has hundreds of resources (books, cassetts, CD's, etc.) for all audiences (even the WS) and on just about any subject you can think of. Immerse yourself w/God's word and just give everything over to him and he will provide for you as you never have thought of and as only he can. start and end the day w/prayer and no matter what happens...trust HIM! continued strength and prayers to you, RR