The OW is stopping at nothing to get what she wants. Now she's using the OC to "bond" with the grandparents. Now all of a sudden she and MIL are so close. She is constantly having her babysit and taking her places. (MIL doesn't drive much). IL's were hardly there for H before but now because of the baby they are such a big part of his life and OW is wonderful. Doesn't matter that my world was destroyed. H and OW don't have to account for anything now because of OC. So I guess any woman who is raped and has a C because of it should be greatful. When a C is involved the rapist shouldn't have to be punished. Maybe we should let every criminal who has a child out of prison because that excuses everything!

You are making it sound like your husband raped OW. Cyn, my OW is at it again. She did not call husband for a while and everything was fine. On June 15th she called my husband. Now she is everything and I am nothing. The latest is he told me he would call OW every day. His butt is out. I am sorry. Cyn, I am not crying. He made his bed and he can lie in it. He does not love me and I have to accept that. His behavior is not love. Before OW called He was hanging pictures on the wall. He also glued a plaque back together he had made for me that said him and me forever. I still love my husband but I can't take his crap any longer.

Your H raped her???

He is a convict???


Remind me again....why YOU want him!?!? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

committed

No I don't think her H raped the OW. I think what Cyn was trying to say, and hopefully I can explain it. If a child is conceived out of a wrong, why does it become a right when that child is born. The OC was conceived during adulterous affair now that the child is born, people are more willing to forgive the couple for their sins. Then if we forgive the adulterous couple, why isn't okay to forgive a rapist when his child is born when the child was conceived during the rape. I know it was a bad analogy, but I think that was the thinking of Cyn.

Cyn,

Don't worry about the OW malipulating your MIL. She is going get caught in her own lies sooner or later. In my case, the OW thought she had my IL's in back of her pocket, guess what she got caught in her own lies and couldn't lie her way out. My ILs don't trust her and don't want her in the family.

The best think you can do is stay calm and focus. My IL's brag how well I handle this whole situation. They are so proud of me. They even bragged about me to my WH who called the other day. Not once did I become irrational or spew out hatred. I stay true to myself and my IL's respect me for that.

So the best thing for you to do, is not ruin your relationship with your in-laws. They are probably putting on their best poker face for the OW. They probably want to see their grandchild. Granted they would love to have the situation reverse, where the child was yours and your husbands, but they are probably trying not to make a bad situation worse.

Remember this is their grandchild, no matter how the child was conceived. Some of their joy of having a new grandchild was tarnished because of the situation. This child should not be punished for their parents action, this child is innocent. I know this child is a reminder of all the pain the OW and WH has caused you. Be true to yourself, if not then the OW has the upper hand.

I didn't think the analogy was that bad but you were right on with your explination HD. You are also right about the IL's and being happy about the C. I will from now on be better at handling the situation. I know it's not OC's fault, it just hard when you are constantly reminded of the A.