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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 217
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 217 |
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<small>[ November 22, 2004, 03:26 PM: Message edited by: joe c. ]</small>
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Joe, there is nothing more you can do at this point. I wouldn't give up hope, but I would also try to start focusing on building up your life without her. You really have no choice at this point.
Like you, I think that she is still in love with you. I feel like her affair will peter out when she sees the caliber of man that OM really is. He has alot going against him and there is alot going against this relationship lasting because they can never trust each other. Once the infatuation wears off, distrust will set in. And the ugliness of having to deal with an Ex-W and a new baby will throw extra conflict into the affair.
OM will be terminally connected to his W through this child. So, the future does not look bright for this affair.
But, in the meantime, you can focus on your life and learn how to live without her. Much easier to say than to do, of course. But I still think there is great hope here because of the great Plan A you did.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 217
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 217 |
Thank you Mel,
That's exactly all the things I've been trying to tell myself, and it is not very easy to handle.
The one thing that's going to drag this thing on is the long distance factor. Every time they get together it's like a romantic getaway. I need this guy to spend real time with my WS so she can sooner see his dark side. And with my good plan A in place, I would like to think that the first sign of this OM's true self will steer my WS back to me.
It doesn't look good though. She's already taken up 2 weeks of vacation time to be with him. I heard he's teaching her to golf. I hope he shows his bad temper that his W told me about.
I hope , for her sake and mine, that I can do this Mel. Every day is a struggle, and an emotional rollercoaster.
I'm back in therapy, just to learn more about me. My WS continued to tell me that I wasn't a happy person, and that's all she wants is for me to be happy. Huh, leaving me is one way to do it. Shattering my dreams and my future is another. Do our WS's even realize some of the things they say when they want out?
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 217
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 217 |
<small>[ November 22, 2004, 03:29 PM: Message edited by: joe c. ]</small>
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