Thanks all for the replies. I look at the reasons my wife has given me so far for leaving a rock solid marriage and I feel like laughing. The trouble is they're not really reasons. I fully expect her to start fabricating more solid reasons in the near future if she hasn't done so already. I don't expect her to lie outright but I do expect her to take all of my faults and exxagerate them. I'll right down a list of possible future reasons for leaving me and we can tick them off if and when they are thrown back in my face as the cause of her total misery with me;
'You were an alcholic.'
True I drunk almost every night. Usually one bottle of white wine and never before 8pm. I work in a nursing home full of elderly dementia sufferers. Each day was an adventure. One day I would be ripping the undergarments of a corpse in which rigor mortis had set in, another day I would be struggling to stop one of the residents from stabbing me with a dinner knife simply because I wanted to take his empty plate away. Every day I suffer appalling verbal abuse. I never went out to pubs because my family was my social life.
This leads nicely onto....
'You never took me out.'
True again. Whenever I asked my wife if she wanted to go out for a drink she always said that she had got the days of pubbing and spending money down the drain out of her system. She much preferred to stay at home and watch a movie. Maybe I could have prevented all of this if only I had forced my wife to go out with me. Interestingly since she hooked up with the OM he has since taken her to a nightclub and she changed her profile on the adult internet site they met on to; 'Up until recently I would say a nice quiet local pub. But last saturday nite (OM) took me to (name of nightclub) and I had a great time..... Can't wait to go again.' Again of note is that when we were together we only had one reliable babysitter, wifes mum. Wife felt uncomfortable asking her mum to babysit all the time but now she has an even more reliable babysitter for half of the week. Me!!!
'You neglected our sex life.'
True. In 10 years of friendship not one week went by without either of us making love. Usually 3-4 times a week. This naturally deteriorated back down to once a week when her EA with OM started properly. Still 2 days before I confronted her she was dressed up in all her finery waiting for me to get home from a 12 hour shift. I'm surprised she did'nt want me to wear a cut-out mask of the OM's face while we made love. Oh, and I forgot to say that in almost 10 years I always made sure that she orgasmed first before me. Such was my negligence.
'You neglected my emotional needs.'
True. I always told her that I loved her and I was so proud of her and so happy with the life we had made for ourselves. When we took our son to school together we were the only couple that held hands all the time. When I arrived home from work I would always give her a big cuddle and tell her how much I missed her.
'You never helped around the house'
True. I only redecorated every single room in the house to her style and tastes whenever she felt it was time for a change. If she wanted new furniture or ornaments I bought them for her. Simple as that.
'We never did anything together.'
True. We only scoured charity shops and boot sales together. On my days of from work I would take her food shopping or shopping down town. I feel so guilty that some days I was just too tired to go out and had to ask her if it would be ok to have a day in.
'You never bought me anything.'
True. I recently packed up her clothes because it was just too difficult opening the wardrobe door and staring at her possessions. Taking into consideration that she took a load of clothes over to her mums when she left I still filled 4 boxes full of her clothes and a couple of black sacks. I've got enough of her clothes to fill another couple of sacks. After clearing the wardrobe I counted my clothes. 5 shirts, 5 jumpers, 6 pairs of trousers and a few T-shirts.
'You never gave me any freedom'
True. She was a full time housewife and mum and a damn good one at that. I bought her a pc and encouraged her to make friends so she could have someone to chat to during the day. Look where that got me. I also encouraged her to take up hobbies and showed a positive interest in everything she did.
Can't think of any more at the moment but I'm sure I will in time. I know that I'm as much to blame for my wife leaving me and I will figure out what I've done wrong in time. Just need more information from her.
*Please note that this post is very tongue in cheek <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> )
