See your doctor NOW. A-D drugs allow you think more rationally. Filing so soon is almost certainly knee-jerk and foggy. There is still hope if you get yourself strong.

You can do NOTHING to affect your WW behaviour directly, but you CAN make yourself strong enough to deal with this.

See your doctor NOW. Hit the brakes, then stop, then start the climb back up when you stronger.

(((STMS))

StrugglingToMakeSense - I feel the same as you do. I was very loving with my WW, put up with a lot, put her first above everyone etc. I think this is more about THEM than us. Some kind of internal issues or something. Feeling undeserving of the kind of love we gave or something. Is she from a broken home? Bad childhood? My WW is and that has a lot to do with all of this. Her father won't even speak to her. How is your WW's R with her father?

oh yeah, my WW left me the day I confronted her. She also filed about a month after that. It is plain immature behavior IMO. They aren't thinking clearly. She also started to have a false recovery or just waffling really. But she said we are already divorced. I said it isn't even final etc. In her head we are ddivorced already and it's not even fnal yet.

Hi again Bob :-)

I will have to see a doctor I know. I had an appointment last week but I used work commitments as an excuse to cancel it. I'm really starting to feel the effects of all this stress, particularly in the mornings. My skin has come out in spots, I'm waking up at approx 4-5 am with a tightness across my chest and my arms feel really funny. Almost like pins and needles but sharper. I can't concentrate on anything but my wife and I'm forever pacing up and down, up and down.
Are these signs symptomatic of stress or depression?

Hi Juke :-)

My wife's parents divorced 10 years ago, they were going through the process of seperation as me and my wife were beginning our relationship.

My wifes mother was involved with a married man for almost a year. She ended it and left my father-in-law. She hooked up with and older man almost instantly and is still with him 10 years later. My wife was around 19 when all of this was happening but she found out about her mothers affair before her father did. Her father was heartbroken. Because my wife and I started out in our relationship with nothing we moved in with her father and had a glorious relationship with him until he met his new wife and left. Since he left my wifes relationship with him has deteriorated almost to the point where they were only contacting each other through birthday cards, xmas cards etc... On many occasions I actually had to push my wife to get in touch with her father to keep their relationship up. My wife would say, 'Yeah I'll phone him tomorrow' but very rarely did. Her relationship with her mum, on the other hand, is very strong. They see each other once a week.

Now this is the funny part. My wifes dad owns a third of our home. Three names on the mortgage. Since my wife left he has shown great interest in her because he and his second wife are skint and they want their share of the money. Fair enough. I want them to have their fair share but not at the cost of our marriage. Her father's renewed interest in his daughter seems solely motivated by selling the house and getting his money. Perhaps I'm being harsh on him but he never mentioned about his share of the money whilst my wife and I were together.

Hi Juke,

I am also seeing that my wifes behaviour in filing so soon is immature and hasty. For the life of me I can't see what she is trying to achieve. She has hopped from a 10 year relationship straight into another relationship with a stranger she chatted to on the internet for a month and a half.

How will she cope with the emotional baggage and loose ends she is carrying from our marriage?

Surely she must feel some sort of GUILT!

We shared a happy 10 years together.

We loved each other dearly.

We have a CHILD who is hurting for crying out loud!

Will she ever calm down enough to step back and UNDERSTAND that filing for divorce this early is not going to solve anything. It won't make her guilt go away or lessen.

I know my real wife is a cold-hearted monster so why is she acting like one?

<small>[ August 15, 2004, 04:14 AM: Message edited by: StrugglingToMakeSense ]</small>