Give me a paintbrush or better yet, digitally send me his pix. I am not artistically inclined so you don't know the extend of my artistic talents or the lack thereof. LOL!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Just kidding.

L.

<small>[ August 09, 2004, 05:04 PM: Message edited by: Orchid ]</small>

I got another cc of the message. The following was attached to those copies of the letter sent to his co-workers:

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">To the Staff/Management of the Department of Homeland Security, Office of Domestic Preparedness:

Don’t you have morality clauses in your department? If a man cannot respect the boundaries surrounding a marriage, how can he be trusted to serve the interests of other things deemed secure? Mr. OM used his travel privileges to have an affair, your e-mail for illicit communications with his lover and your phone to harass her husband, all on the government’s (taxpayers) dime. Now he wants to leave/transfer scott free after breaking up their marriage. Is this the fiber of people working for this esteemed department? Is this type of abuse tolerable? Some of us citizens are sick of the lack of values demonstrated by our public servants. We hope this message to him will remind him that one person’s actions affect an entire community of people. A family is broken, and a department duped. He plays and we pay? Deplorable.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I think this may have gone to his superiors. I'm super curious. I know my friends, though, someone will spill the beans soon enough. I don't think I can ask WW right now...

Wow. It gets even better and better. Hope it doesn't fall into the hands of someone already having an A. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

L.

Brace yourself, DLC. This is coming back to you soon. Wow, it's the Fourth of July in that office.

This is a wonderfully earth-scorching set of consequences smashing down on these two. I'm sorry such a thing has to happen, but this is what the village is all about.

GC

I never thought i'd ever see the words 'wonderful' and 'earth scorching' in the same sentence. Yes the hammer will come down. These are the things that happen when you dip into the deep waters of an A.

We have those contradictions here in the world of betrayal, grieving, and recovery don't we?

There can be great beauty in the suffering we BS experience. I remember two months ago, when I was often curled on my couch, crying so hard it hurt, weeping for hours at a time. There were moments when I felt strangely alive to have such powerful emotions for another person. There's something almost divine in all that pain, man.

Okay, let me pass this bong down to the next person and go make my dinner. Cheers DLC.

GC

Yes sometimes we don't even know such powerful emotions exist. Scary, yet revealing all at once...

bmp

<small>[ August 10, 2004, 07:53 AM: Message edited by: dleightonc ]</small>

I sent a thank you e-mail to my friends tonite, acknowledging their support in all of this. Their paryers mean more to me than that letter. I wonder, though, how a OP faced with such a strong response from a community not his own feels?

You really want to know how WW and OM feel right now?

Anger. Fury beyond words, in fact.

Humiliation.

Shame. Deep, deep guilt.

Rage. Rage rage rage rage rage.

Disgust. Horror.


That's all as it should be, yes? Yes.

Now, the hard part. ALL of this is going to be directed at you. And so is all of the fallout. What might that be?

- Lawsuits claiming libel and slander.
- Charges of harassment.
- Violence.
- Restraining orders.
- Ranting, screaming, and other verbal abuse.
- Custody implications and actions.

My friend, these are all real possible outcomes for you. That you are the wrong target will mean nothing while you're nursing a black eye or a few thousand dollars of legal fees.

What do you do about it? Stay as dark as dark can be. Take this stuff to your attorney and explain that you DID NOT KNOW it was being prepared and that you had no hand in preparing it. Get ready to have a restraining order placed against OM and WW, if they make any threats toward you at all.

In other words, batten down the hatches and prepare for the storm.

The storm will die away in a few days or weeks, and the destruction in its wake will have a lovely effect on the affair. That's all good -- I just don't want you or your family hurt in the process.

Thanks for the heads up. My friends here are saying the same thing! There is nothing in that letter, however, that's not true. If they went there, then a lot more than what that letter stated would come out.

You're right. Going dark is the best thing to do right now.

d:

Just saw this.

Don't know what 2 say. I found myself overcome by a WAVE of EMOTION, putting myself in your shoes (or B.F. Goodrich sandals, if you're my age). Imagining such a letter being sent 2 RM...

I'm not sure that's healthy. And like Just J pointed out, even though you had no hand in writing that excellent letter, you may reap the fallout from it.

Take care and stay on the high road, okay?
-ol' 2long

Thanks. I've got faith.

My friends all said that they wouldn't tell who wrote it, but they'd back me up if I got confronted about it. "Bring it on!" they said. That's very heartening.

I'd dime this guy out. Contact the OPR, explain the situation and mention you're writing an article about it.

The high road is fine...but not when it involves my tax dollars.

Your best bet for reconciliation won't happen until your kids mention to your ex that you started dating. Women aren't all that complicated.

Realllly??? And I thought that women were the most mysterious beings in the universe. Now angels, they're simple...

Hello --

Indeed, if the OM has used federal funds for purposes that are not legitmate, each federal department has an Office of the Inspector General to which fraud can and should be reported. I don't know Homeland Security's set-up, but it should be easy to find, probably on its website.

I did this exact thing (different department), but it wasn't my own WW -- this was before I even knew of my WW's ONS. I had a friend who was using travel funds to further an affair with a co-worker at the cost and dismay of his entire staff and the mission of their work. He never knew who reported this, but I suspect I was not the only one.

He was investigated, and while the immediate investigation did not result in disciplinary action, he was counseled, moved and within a year took an early retirement. I was disgusted with his actions on many levels, but the Office of Inspector General's office is interested in misuse of funds and the more details you can provide, the better.

The only reason my former friend skated a bit was because his OW could conceivably claim the travel was necessary to her duties. A bit of a stretch, but in the end, he's gone. She's not, unfortunately. But karma is patient.

Shellybird

Yes the DHS has a IG office. the director's name is--get this--clark Kent Ervin. I researched this while preparing for a trial. I don't know, however if a report was made.

Now doing my civic duty will make me seem like an a%%%****e. What a mess...

bmp

It has been posited that telling on him is a threat to national security. Bunk! Him telling my WxW all his business is. It's amazing how anything can be transformed in the fog...

<small>[ August 11, 2004, 04:53 PM: Message edited by: dleightonc ]</small>