I did a good plan A I believe. The day he moved back near me I worked plan A from April 19th until he said no I don't want to work on anything in the middle June. He was still in contact with her and after a week I could not do it any longer, so I told him to call me when he broke it off. She called him that night and he did and then was extrememly angry at me because he said I told him to and he didn't want to. Then he changed overnight again and would not work on anything. I had to take this road for self preservation. I could not be around him with all this going on. It was literaly destrying me and I in fact I lost job. He was not over her and no amount of anything I did changed it. I have to trust God and allow God to work with him. I can no longer see him or talk with him. I am in pain and yes the though of her moving here kills me but it is out of my control. He left the marriage because he is 53, unable to perform the way he used to, and she has been there as his employee, he her supervisor, she hero worshiped him, he gave her rides home and she listened to all his woes. The thought popped into his head to tell her his feelings and it went from there. He says he was beginning to lose the feelings for me before that, she was there, picked up on it and bam it happened. It was not about me, he said it was about him and I did nothing to have his feelings decline, he says they just did. I feel I have done everything I could, and I am now going to stay away completely and give God total control. I can do nothing any longer, except work on me and wait. I read the book Surviving an Affair and I followed it I feel. I spent weeks and weeks listening to his feelings for her, and how he had a special place for me in his heart but blah blah, he is in a selfish place and there is nothing I can do. His parents are supporting his decision if it makes him happy. Our children are not, and they are all adults so please understand that I need your support and not your words that say I didn't do a good plan A. My Christian counsellor says I did, I believe I did, and it is not flesh and blood I wrestle against but the principalities of darkness. Please pray for us and that I will be able to be strong and to stay in the Lord so I can find freedom from this horrible situation.
Suzcares

Suz, I thought I was supporting you with my opinion but I can see you didn't want to hear that. I wish you the best. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Melodylane and Blessed Time. I owe you both an appology. You were trying to help me and i am sorry for my reaction. It hurt so much when I thought I was doing things the right way and when you gave me your opinion I did not react in love and thanking you for your reply. I have no experience in this area and I am new to the website. I am relying on my counselor and the Holy Spirit to guide me and I so I tried my best to do what I was guided to do. To attack you with my words was so wrong. Please forgive me. Please communicate with me again. My email address is suz_work@shaw.ca if you would like to speak privately through email. I thank God for you both and pray blessings on both of you and your situations.
Suzcares

Suz,

I think the question you need to ask yourself, is do you think you did a good plan A? If so, then by all means go to plan B because it will protect your love for your H.

I do hope that you find a new job and that this distance will help. I suspect your H will enjoy being with OW for awhile but he will miss other things. Only time will tell, but in the meantime start working on your life and bringing some joy to it. This is a long hard process but it is a process so stick with it for awhile.

God Bless,

JL

Thank you so much, Suz! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />